While George Michael is up in Heaven waiting for the angels to finish making him a sexy white leather biker jacket with holes cut in the back for his wings, his long-term boyfriend Fadi Fawaz is filling us in on some of the details of his death on Sunday.
We’ll never be able to show anyone that smile again and it’s all because that wretched trash monster of awfulness known as 2016 has struck again. Alan Thicke, who played one of the greatest (and hottest) TV dads of the 80s, died today at the age of 69. It gets sadder, Alan Thicke had a heart attack while playing hockey with his 19-year-old son Carter. He was taken to Providence St. Joseph’s Medical Center in Burbank, CA where he was pronounced dead.
TMZ says that Alan and Carter were playing at around 11 this morning when he started to have chest pains and eventually vomited. An ambulance took him to the hospital 30 minutes later. Many didn’t believe the news at first, because a tweet came from Alan’s account at around 2pm PST. But Alan’s rep confirmed to People that the world has lost a Canadian legend.
Alan started off as a game show host in his homeland of Canada before he went off to Hollywood. Norman Lear hired Alan to host a game show that I never knew existed but wish I could binge-watch tonight. The show was called Fernwood-2-Night and it was a talk show based on characters from the cult gem Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman. Alan hosted a few more game shows, including Thicke of the Night, before he was cast as psychiatrist and DILF Jason Seaver on Growing Pains. Alan played Jason Seaver for all 7 seasons of Growing Pains.
After Growing Pains, Alan guest starred on a million other shows like Married…with Children, The Bold and the Beautiful and How I Met Your Mother. This year, he was on episodes of Fuller House and This Is Us.
Alan and his ex-wife Gloria Loring (Robin Thicke’s mom) worked together to create some of the diamonds in the TV show theme song treasure chest. They wrote the theme songs for Facts of Life and Diff’rent Strokes.
Alan Thicke is survived by his wife Tanya Callau and his three kids, Robin, Brennan and Carter.
Rest in peace, Alan Thicke. Thank you for everything, especially this perfection:
That evil dead-souled monster 2016 just had to come along and repeatedly knee us all in the heart by taking away one of America’s favorite moms, Carol Brady, on Thanksgiving of all days. Every piece of leftover pie is going to taste like lukewarm shit today. Pour out all of the Wesson oil, because Florence Henderson died yesterday. She was 82.
Earlier today, PBS released a sad statement saying that PBS NewsHour co-anchor, political analyst, debate moderator, author, and groundbreaking journalist Gwen Ifill has died at 61. Gwen was battling cancer for several months.
Gwen Ifill started out in journalism as an intern at the Boston Herald-American, an experience in which some asshole racist employee left a note with the n-word on her desk telling her to go home. That didn’t stop Gwen Ifill from working in journalism, which led to her checking off a couple of career “firsts.” She was the first black woman to work at the Herald. She was also the first black woman to moderate a vice presidential debate in 2004. Gwen Ifill also moderated that 2008 vice presidential debate between Joe Biden and Sarah Palin, which probably made her want to swear off moderating vice presidential debates the second Sarah cited her pal Joe Six-pack.
2016 is squeezing out more shit news until the very end (or until every one of us launches ourselves off of this planet. Either or.) Fuck this year, officially.
The legendary Canadian poet, singer, songwriter and Buddhist monk (for real) Leonard Cohen died today at the age of 82. His cause of death hasn’t been released yet. The news was announced on his Facebook page tonight:
It is with profound sorrow we report that legendary poet, songwriter and artist, Leonard Cohen has passed away.
We have lost one of music’s most revered and prolific visionaries.
A memorial will take place in Los Angeles at a later date. The family requests privacy during their time of grief.
Rolling Stone says that after graduating from McGill University, Leonard moved to the Greek island of Hydra where he wrote and published several books of poetry including Beautiful Losers (aka the book that some of us read out loud in high school while lying on the carpet and passing a cigarette with friends). His songwriting career was born in 1966 when he visited NYC and met Judy Collins, who recorded two of his songs for her album. He wrote more songs Judy and also songs for Willie Nelson and James Taylor before singing his own stuff.
In his musical career, which lasted nearly 50 years, he released just 14 studio albums. That seems like nothing since nowadays, pop tricks burp up an album every 12 months. His last album You Want It Darker came out this year. When it was released, Leonard did an interview with the New Yorker and said that he was in a bad way health-wise. Most know Leonard Cohen from his song Hallelujah. It came out in 1984 and has been covered by absolutely every single person who has ever sung a musical note. Hallelujah is definitely his most famous song, but I’m going to leave you with one of my favorites.
Rest in peace, Leonard Cohen.
And here’s some news that is sadness wrapped in awfulness and stuffed with more sadness. Playboy model and the “Queen of Snapchat,” Katie May, died at the age of 34 last February after suffering a stroke caused by a blocked artery. The Los Angeles County Coroner did an autopsy to figure out what exactly happened to her. Los Angeles Assistant Chief Coroner Ed Winter tells People that they have ruled that Katie’s death was caused by a chiropractor session gone horrifically wrong. During a “neck manipulation” by Katie’s chiropractor, her left vertebral artery was torn, which stopped blood flow to her brain.