If you’ve got a dog friend in your life, tell them to stop what they’re doing (taking their 18th nap of the day, probably) and pour out some of their kibble for Boo the Pom Pom. Boo was an internet star who had more Facebook followers than all of us combined times a million (unless your name is Vin Diesel, and if that’s the case, that last line isn’t for you and I’m also going to need you to serenade Boo with one of your touching nightingale bro ballads) and was once declared the World’s Cutest Dog. Sadly, the fluffy ball of animatronic teddy bear adorableness died yesterday morning at the age of 12.
We’re not even two full days into 2019, and the Grim Reaper has already given the hug of death to three famous 76ers. WWE interviewer Mean Gene Okerlund died today. He was 76. Bob Einstein (who was on Curb Your Enthusiasm and was Super Dave Osborne) also died today. He was 76 too. And now comes the news that Daryl Dragon, who was Captain to Toni Tennille’s Tennille, died due to renal failure today in Prescott, Arizona. And like Mean Gene and Super Dave, he was 76. QUICK, form a power prayer circle around Harrison Ford, Barbra Streisand, Judge Judy, Betsey Johnson, and other famous 76ers.
All together now: NOOOOOOOOOOOO. And more NOOOOOOOOS.
The legendary Penny Marshall is doing the saddest schlemiel schlimazel dance up to heaven after dying at her home in the Hollywood Hills last night. She was 75. Penny’s rep Michelle Bega confirmed this Mt. Everest-sized sad, saying that she died from diabetes complications:
“Yes she did (die) … peacefully at her Hollywood Hills home. She passed away form complications from diabetes.”
Because I watched reruns of Laverne & Shirley over and over again (and happened to love when they moved to Burbank, and partly because we got Rhonda), it’s weird knowing that this is now a world without Laverne from Laverne & Shirley in it. But Penny Marshall was so much more than Laverne.
(Side note: Since my idea of weightlifting is lifting a can of Pringles while on the couch, you might be thinking that I learned the bro phrase “making gains” from watching a gay porn scene that takes place in a gym. And you’d be right.)
The floor at the gym in heaven is covered with kneeling muscle bros bowing down to a legendary buff icon as he waddled on in. Roger The Buff Kangaroo, who became an internet star and won Hot Slut of the Month in 2015, has died at the age of 12. No, Roger didn’t die in a lifting accident gone wrong. That’s not possible since Roger could lift ANYTHING. Roger died of the olds.
Oprah’s mom, Vernita Lee (seated in the above pic), passed away at her home in Milwaukee, Wisconsin on Thanksgiving at the age of 83. Oprah’s family has said services and a burial were already held for Vernita.
My late-90s self and my current day self are hugging each other while humming the melody to Girl On TV, because this is now a world where only one member of LFO is living. TMZ says that Devin Lima died early this morning after the shit-encrusted Satanic demon known as cancer took him at the way, way, way too young age of 41.