Prince Philip’s Cause Of Death Was Released And Prince William And Duchess Kate Launched A YouTube Channel

Forget all those conspiracy theories that have been flying around since Prince Philip was laid to rest. He wasn’t poisoned or strangled by an enemy of the crown who snuck into Windsor Castle disguised as an under butler or chambermaid. And he didn’t die from fright after catching a glimpse of his reflection while checking his teeth for watercress using a fish knife. Newsweek reports that the official cause of death listed on the 99.8-year-old’s death certificate is “old age,” simple as that, putting to bed any rumors that a hermit living in the hills behind Balmoral Castle cursed him with life-everlasting many centuries ago. And lest the entirety of the British Monarchy likewise die from old age, Prince William is stepping up as the hip, new, least racist face of the British Royal Family. He and Duchess Kate have launched a YouTube channel! Cue Prince Harry laughing in Netflix. “L00,000,000,000,000,000.00L!”

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