Kanye West Bought A Concrete House In Mailbu For $57 Million

September 22, 2021 / Posted by:

We were this close to having Kanye West move to an island in Japan but alas, it looks like he’s staying stateside and has just dropped $57.3 million on a house in Malibu designed by renowned Japanese architect Tadao Ando known for critical regionalism design. Dirt reports that ever since Kanye visited Naoshima, Japan’s “art island,” he’s been “obsessed with the place,” and that owning a Tadao Andro is the next best thing. So now he owns a concrete bunker on a busy street in Malibu penned in by neighbors who are close enough to high-five through the kitchen window. But hey, at least it’s on the beach and Kanye can use his latex gimp suit as a wetsuit if he ever decides to take up surfing. Hope remembers to unzip the mouth!

Dirt calls the home “part house, part sculpture” for which Kanye paid “a whopping $57.3 million, in an off-market deal.” And he probably paid in cash. He bought it from Ashley Olsen’s ex-boyfriend, retired Wall Street financier Richard Sachs, who had the property listed for $75 million last year before taking it off the market. There are no pictures of the interior, but here’s what you get for the price of being Kanye.

This is a weird me thing, but this house makes me think about the smell of soup wafting up from a museum cafeteria. And like that soup, it’s probably OK but way overpriced. And like a museum/his old house, Kanye probably won’t be visiting more than once or twice a year. Dirt reports that the sale is the second most expensive real estate purchase recorded in Malibu. Richard bought the property in 2003 for $1.9 million.

Beginning in the mid-aughts, Sachs spent millions, and seven years of planning and construction, to build a hulking three-story house that more closely resembles a military-grade bunker than it does an ordinary home. The structure reportedly required 1,200 tons of poured concrete, 200 tons of steel reinforcement and 12 pylons driven 60 feet into the ground, supporting the monstrously heavy house from sinking into the sand.

The lot itself is quite compact and sits cheek-to-jowl between two other homes, spanning under 5,700 square feet and stretching from the road to the beach. Out front, the two-lane street is often trafficked by local surfers and other beachgoers, who enjoy the relatively wide public beach and the good waves in this particular neighborhood pocket. The vaguely Brutalist-inspired house itself has no yard and nary a single plant, so West will save money on landscaping bills.

So no urine garden but at least Kanye can just step outside and piss directly into the wind.

Even though it may be lacking the relative warmth of Kim Kardashian’s Hidden Hills haunted mausoleum, I can still imagine many a cheery Christmas to come at dad’s Brutalist bunker. The children tucked tightly in their military cots, awake to find Santa has arrived downstairs! As they march, single file, down the stairs they are greeted by the smell of freshly reconstituted MREs as the joyful sounds of Dark December: A Philip Glass X-mas fills the air. Their stockings, shapeless rough-hewn raw wool sacs, are hung with great care, suspended from the ceiling with bailing wire, are to be seen, but not touched. Instead, a docent hired for the occasion will point and explain to each child what their stocking contains — 5 walnuts symbolizing the family unit and a losing lottery scratcher that’s already been scratched. The metallic shavings from this act were harvested to make the “tinsel” that now adorns the “tree” — a single red rose left on the floor of the empty foyer. Now that’s a Kanye Christmas!

Pic: Wenn.com

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