Kim Kardashian and Kanye West’s haunted mausoleum is apparently a real bitch to keep clean. Sure the ectoplasm and satanic pea soup sputum is pretty easy to wipe down, but the wear and tear on their floors from all the ghosts dragging their chains up and down those cavernous hallways is a real problem. According to People, Kim and Kanye’s floors are made from Belgian plaster (which the Kardashian-Wests probably have specially ground from the bones of poor people harvested from a pauper’s cemetery outside of Ghent) which requires expert maintenance. If one of the children inadvertently touches the floor after falling from the special floor protecting catwalk (kid-friendly scaffolding installed around the home’s interior perimeter) Kim and Kanye have to fly in a crew of craftsmen from Europe to remove any scuffs.
“The lushly landscaped exterior of the property [West] shares with his wife, Kim Kardashian West, and their four children (North, Saint, Chicago and Psalm) serves as stark contrast to the unadorned alabaster walls within. Nearly every surface is a monastic shade of white,” Greenburg writes. “The floors are made of a special Belgian plaster; if scuffed, the delicate material can be repaired only by a crew flown in from Europe.”
And while the Ghost of Blowjobs Past (the moaning reaches a fever pitch every time Kim’s Instagram follows dip below 1.4 million) may wreak havoc on Kim and Kanye’s pristine floors, they don’t take any chances with other visitors. Like any other sterile hospital or asylum environment, precautions are taken to ensure good hygiene protocols are observed.
Upon arriving at their home, Greenburg was greeted in the foyer by an assistant who asked the journalist to cover his sneakers with cloth booties, so as not to damage or scuff the floor with them.
I suppose handing out booties is a smart way to go. And we know there’s no shortage of spare booties hanging around that house. To be honest, I’m not mad at a no shoes in the house policy. But that’s because my ass is too lazy to Swiffer more than once a month. But I always let guests choose if they want to leave their shoes on or not, because you never know who’s going to show up at your house with an embarrassing pedicure, or an entire cheese course smuggled in between their toes.
Obviously Kim and Kanye must make some exceptions. They let Kenny G keep his shoes on and uncovered. But if you’re gonna break the rules, you better make it fashion (and blame Satan, your Dark Lord And Savior for making you do it).
Pic: Vogue via YouTube