Martha Stewart Dissed Goop Again

August 28, 2019 / Posted by:

The line was drawn in the sand long ago and two factions emerged. The Bloods and Crips of the lifestyle brand market–Martha Stewart really fucking hates Gwyneth Paltrow. The only thing she likes less is an anti-fur activist screaming in the halls. While on the season two premiere of Barstool Sport’s The Corp podcast, Martha ended up being asked about her long-standing competition with Gwyneth to be THEE premiere caucasian woman telling other affluent caucasian women how to live their best lives. And as expected, the hatchet has not been buried and she’s still anti-Goop.

E! News says that Alex Rodriguez and Martha (what a combo) sat down for a discussion about her businesses in the lifestyle, cooking and publishing markets. He of course had to ask about Goop–just because he’s a retired MLB player doesn’t mean he doesn’t absolutely live for some piping hot tea, honey. He asked:

“How would you describe what Gwyneth Paltrow is doing today versus what Martha Stewart created years ago.”

Now Martha and Gwynnie have never shied away from slapping at each other in the past. Martha’s told Gwyneth to stick to acting, they’ve both released shady recipes about one another–because the rich white woman version of a diss track is “Katie Is A Bitch Peach Cobbler”–and Martha has hit Gwyneth and Goop with an “I don’t know her” in the past. Well Martha’s repeating that recipe, because she doesn’t know what a Goop is, except for that Gwyneth is a movie star while Martha is a hardworking woman!

“I don’t follow goop. Sometimes I look at products that she’s selling… I wish every young entrepreneur well and I hope that there are many, many, many different kinds of entrepreneurs… if they’re movie stars or hardworking women like I am, who are not movie stars… If they have a good idea, I want them to be able to succeed. So good luck, Gwyneth.”

I don’t know what it is that Gwyneth did to piss Martha off. Did one of Goop’s vaginal insertion crystals go wonky for her? Maybe she had the wrong kind? She used lapis instead of jade? Or jade instead of blessed quartz? Was it the menopause pills? Did they affect your sleep-waves? Maybe Ryan Murphy can do another Feud season where it’s Gwyneth Vs Martha–but I guess Gwyn and Ryan would need to fall out first if we wanted the real tea. Well, we can hope!


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