Pete Davidson Is Clearing Up Those Big Dick Size Rumors
People is reporting that Pete “10-Inches” Davidson is actually more like Pete “A Solid Six And A Half But He Knows How To Use It” Davidson. At a recent stand up gig at the Tarrytown Music Hall in New York, Pete talked about ex-fiancé Ariana Grande‘s now-infamous reference to Pete’s dick size. She’d previously had us out here thinking Pete was hung like a porn star and Pete basically co-signed the narrative because who doesn’t want a 10-inch penis? Well it’s looking like Pete has some buyer’s remorse because now he’s spilling the tea on his own self.
Sorry Size-Queens of the world, but all that Big Dick Energy is just that: energy. Pete said that it was both “mean” and “genius” of Ariana to say he has a big dick. Read Pete’s deep-dive analysis:
“I don’t like that she talked all that shit for my penis… Everything is huge to her… Why would she tell everyone that I have a huge penis? So that every girl who sees my dick for the rest of my life is disappointed.”
I mean, Pete, girl: I don’t think anyone actually thought that your dick was 10 inches long. I think we all just assumed Ariana Grande was bad at math. But I guess since he’s been seen talking to Kate Beckinsale recently, Pete is trying to get ahead of the problem and let the world know (AKA Kate) what they should expect. And it’s not a ruler-sized dick, know that.
What a bad break up: tons of tattoos to cover up and now a dick size you need to come clean about. I guess Pete will have to stick to wooing his future mates with wit and kindness instead of the promise of a penis that can double as a rolling pin.