Ariana Grande Claims That Fiancé Pete Davidson Is Packing 10 Inches

June 23, 2018 / Posted by:

These two love-trolls. Yes, your instantaneous happiness and boundless enthusiasm for showing off your romance for the ages, while you publicly add block and upon block to your Jenga tower of bliss, irritates the cynical. Pete Davidson is a comedian, so he obviously likes to clown on people. And Ariana Grande licks donuts and hates America, which means she’s obviously down for psychologically torturing the masses. So why not keep tormenting the pessimists out there, right?

Please note that Jenga tower analogy… BECAUSE THIS WILL FALL. IT WILL FALL. Oh, and Ariana let it “slip” (*side-eye*) that Pete’s two inches short of a foot in the pants area. By that, I mean she’s claiming he’s got a ten inch cock. Cut to Michael K adjusting his new high ponytail weave and donning a big sweatshirt with no pants, in order to replace Ariana in Pete’s crotch heart!

Twitter user ginagrande_ (via ONTD) posted some tweets between Ariana and a fan about a “Pete interlude” on her upcoming album Splenda, Sweetener. Someone made the mistake of asking about the length of this interlude. Prepare to tee-hee!

She fuckin’ did! Either that, or her betrothed is insecure and has her Twitter password. He’s probably got it tattooed on his ballsack to join the other Ariana-themed ink continuing to congregate on his body.

In other Ariana/Pete news, she’s not pregnant but is definitely feelin’ fecund.

And we also learned from Ariana’s Instagram, (via ONTD) that being the world’s #1 Ariana Grande fan means Pete Davidson gets his own personal Ariana Grande mini-concerts from atop of that alleged 10 inch dick!

So that’s a photo shoot in progress, right? Or do the High Pony Hangers-On have to hang out and get caught in the deluge of sickly sweet love love love emanating from these two? Hopefully, Pete passes the bong, because how else to deal with being in the same room as that?

Pic: Twitter

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