Kanye West’s Lecture At Oxford Was Every Bit As Kanye West-y As You’d Imagine
Seen above looking like a next-level batshit crazy version of Steve Jobs, Kanye West gave a lecture at Oxford University in London on Monday afternoon, and it was pretty much exactly what you’d imagine a lecture at a fancy English university from America’s delusional tantrum-throwing adult toddler would sound like. Picture the nonsense public bus rantings of a dude who wears a coat made from McDonald’s burger wrappers and a mangy ferret on his shoulder like a pirate’s parrot, except if that dude was rich and famous and married to Kim Kardashian.
Kanye’s lecture wasn’t recorded and no pictures were allowed, probably because technology hasn’t advanced enough to truly capture his genius or some such bullshit, but thankfully student news site The Tab Oxford managed to capture the best, most Kanye-y bits and post them on Twitter.
On how he could have been bigger than Picasso, and if the haters disagree, they can deal with it:
“My goal, if I was going to do art, fine art, would have been to become Picasso or greater. That always sounds so funny to people, comparing yourself to someone who has done so much, and that’s a mentality that suppresses humanity”On how greedy money-humping whores are preventing us from living in a perfect society:
“We have the resources as a civilization to make a utopia, but we’re led by the most greedy and the least noble”On how he’s the captain of the football team when it comes to art:
“I approach creativity like a sport, if I have a drawing I react just like a jock: LOOK AT THE FUCKING DRAWING OVER THERE YEAH”On how Kanye is a modern-day martyr:
“I don’t think there’s a living celebrity with more weapons formed against him, but I don’t think there’s one more prosperous”On name-dropping harder than his mother-in-law at a pimp convention:
“Obama calls the home phone, by the way”On crab people (???):
“We have the ability to approach our race like ants, or we have the ability to approach our race like crabs”On wanting the ability to one day rush the stage and shout “Yo Arieh Warshel, Imma let you finish, but…“
“They need to do award shows for Nobel Peace Prize, but I guess that doesn’t sell as many MasterCard ads. No offense to MasterCard, but that was a big fucking logo”On how he’s no longer the egotistical asshole you once knew:
“One of my biggest Achilles heels has been my ego. And if I, Kanye West, can remove my ego, I think there’s hope for everyone”On North West:
“People ask me how my daughter is doing. She’s only doing good if your daughter’s doing good. We’re all one family”On…I don’t even fucking know:
“If I’m at a show and a stranger grabs my hand and says we’re going to use these moving lights, I’ll scream at the top of my fucking lungs”On how he’s the most well-regarded person in the room (if that room is filled with no one and nothing, of course):
“People say I’ve got a bad reputation. I think I’ve got the best reputation in the building”On how he lives in a magical 1950s world where a sodie-pop still costs a nickle:
“Clothing should be like food. There should never be a $5000 sweater. You know what should cost $5000? A car”
After reading all of that, if one of you could tell me what in the hell he was lecturing on, I would really appreciate it, because I have no fucking CLUE. Clothes? Picasso? Obama? He literally just talked about himself to the sound of tuition dollars being flushed down the toilet. Actually, now that I think about it, was Kanye’s lecture was all just a ruse orchestrated by the Oxford psychology department so that students could study a real-life example of chronic narcissistic personality disorder? Hmmm.
But that might not be the only lecture he’s giving while he’s in England (“Oh bother” sighed every fancy British university student). Here’s Kim’s Kurrent Husband arriving at University of the Arts Central Saint Martins today:
