You Know You're Every Kind Of Drunk When.....
Bronson Pelletier used to be known as "WHO?!" or that dude from Twilight and now he's known as that drunk, dirty, sick motherfucker who pissed in the middle of LAX. Well, I guess being known as the dude who drunk pissed in the airport is better than being known as a dude from Twilight. So well, played, I mean, well peed, Bronson!
Last week, TMZ scooped CNN by breaking the highly important news story of how Bronson Pelletier was arrested for being a drunken mess at LAX. Brosnon was pulled off of his flight, because the pilot declared him way too messed up on the sweet nectar to fly. It was a good call, because if he wasn't pulled off of that flight, he would've pissed in the aisle like he was R. Kelly and that plane floor was an underage girl, and every passenger would've gotten ten whiffs of beer-infused bladder water. Right after Bronson was kicked off the plane, he pulled out his weapon and pissed.... and pissed.... and pissed... and pissed.... and pissed until his extra long pee time was cut short by an officer who tackled him to the ground. The officer didn't even let him shake!
At the time of his arrest, Bronson denied giving a golden shower show in the middle of the airport, but since the video has come out, his spokeswhore says he realizes he has a problem and is going to go to rehab to deal with his issues with booze and with getting piss happy in public.
You know, after watching that pissy mess of a video, I am so proud of myself for never being so damn drunk that an officer had to put my shit back into my panties after tackling me to the ground, because I made a pee pee all over the carpet. You should be proud of yourself too if you've never done that.
And yeah they could've cleaned that puddle of bad decisions up with a Bissel pet cleaner, but an easier way to clean it up would've been to let the Twihards in. Bronson Pelletier has been on the same set as Robert Pattinson. So there's a chance he pissed in the urinal next to RPattz's urinal. So there's a chance some of RPattz's sparkly piss fumes floated over to Bronson's peen. So there's a chance that some of RPattz's sparkly piss fumes got on that airport carpet when Bronson did a #1 on it. Tell that to a Twihard, back up and let their wet vacuum coochie go to work.
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Frankly, inexcusable.
LONG piss for a little guy, he didn't even open his pants, just reaches in and starts the water works, LOL. Depardieu who? Pretty good aim for a drunk. ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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One time, years ago, I was drunk and had to go into an multi office building. I think the building housed my insurance company or AAA auto or something like that. But I had to walk down somekind of inside corridor to get to the office and I ended up stopping and peeing in a little nook along the way. Inside. And I felt really weird about that later. The only time I have peed in public unless it is outside and well out of sight. But this takes the cake. God Bless him.
A friend of mine isn't allowed to pass out on the couches or carpets at our house because he always pisses himself when he passes out. Every single time. It's easier to clean piss off of hardwood than fabric.
I remember I was at a youth street dance in our small downtown when I was like 15 and some drunk dude came out of one of the local bars and just pissed all over, he wrote his name and everything, but it just kept going and going and going it was kinda amazing actually lol
Reminds me of back in the day, Dr. Stillman's popular weight loss diet book, which included 8 tall glasses of water daily, and people were going, WHAT? I can't drink all that. But apparently some folks can.
Watching this thing made me feel like peeing. Sound of running water and all that. No one else?
I was thinking the Native American reference was to Leonard Peltier. I googled the kid and the poster (too lazy to go back and look)was partially correct. The kid is of Indian descent but is a Canadian citizen which makes him First Nation and not any sort of American.
Submitted by dementa on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 2:47pm.
Did anyone see "Bronson P…." and immediately think, Balki was peeing in an airport?!
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YES!
Cat >^,,^<
Guys have the HUGEST bladders! that was gallons! then he cried like a little girl...
They should make him clean up his mess. I feel sorry for the poor airport janitor that has to do it.
Submitted by dementa on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 2:47pm.
Did anyone see "Bronson P…." and immediately think, Balki was peeing in an airport?!
*hangs head*
lmao @ TR!!
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:42pm.
Submitted by Bigbendy on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:30pm.
That reminds me of the time when I drove into a restaurant parking lot with my young son and his friend. A waman was squatting and peeing in the middle of the lot. My son was yelling look at her and his friend was mad because he missed it. Good times.
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buddy of mine was pissing in an alley downtown when a cop walked up and told him to "cut it off and put it away"... my friend goes, "cut it off? like just stop pissing? dude, do you even have a dick?"... didn't end well for my friend.
oh, and I dated a chick who stuck her ass out the passenger window of my car and pissed while we were driving down the interstate at 80mph... fuckin HOT!
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Damnit Jack, your stories are always better than mine. LMFAO
My dream of getting to watch a drunk guy pee in an airport may never come true, but at least I have this.
Ah hahahaha.
Submitted by TexnDoc on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:12pm.
He should continue to insist it never happened and hire Susan Rice.
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No, Shawn Holley, she makes everything go away for Lindsay Hohan.
That was one long piss.
Sheeee-yit. Getting cast as "wolf #4" in a Twilight flick is not cause for that much celebration, simmer down now. Or maybe he's DRINKING TO FORGET. Yeah, that makes more sense.
Excruuuuciating. And it's one of those long ones too--the piss, not the cock. They didn't even let him finish. Animals!
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Don't make me quote Nabokov at you. I'll do it. I promise.
Just wanted to add: 10/10, would watch again.
Did anyone see "Bronson P…." and immediately think, Balki was peeing in an airport?!
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Submitted by pandapants84 on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 2:14pm.
I hate when headlines will read "Twilight star" and you get excited that it's Taylor Lautner but it's just some nobody who was in the movie.
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#1 Know your audience. I don't think there is a single poster here that would get excited about anyone from a Twishit movie.
#2 If MK thought your blog was so great, he would link to you in Afternoon Crumbs. GTFO, leech.
His sentence should be a marathon viewing of all the damn Twilight movies.
Submitted by pandapants84 on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 2:14pm.
I hate when headlines will read "Twilight star" and you get excited that it's Taylor Lautner
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People still get excited about Taylor Lautner?
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If I see something I haven't seen before, I'll throw a dollar at it.
What does being Native American have to do with it?? I guess Charlie Sheen, Lindsay Lohan and David Hasselhoff are all Native American too?
I don't know why, but this video literally made me LOL. Get your life together, dude! ...this reminds me of college days, squating down behind a car in random parking lots cause I couldn't hold it until we made it to the dorms. Good times! Lol.
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"I was half a virgin when I met him!"
-Mean Girl,Regina George
I hate when headlines will read "Twilight star" and you get excited that it's Taylor Lautner but it's just some nobody who was in the movie.
Check out my thoughts on film and television www.amandalovesmovies.com
If Twitwat was my only claim to fame, Id be drunk all the time too.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by Blueberri_Jam on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 2:05pm.
I'm surprised I've just seen a flacid peen on Youtube. I didn't hate the experience.
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Dang! You people are giving me a lot of new material here. Mr. Gobbler: "Was it good for you?" Me: "I didn't hate the experience."
lol
TR, yeah I forgot about the quirky LAPD.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
LOL at all the comments on this thread :D.
I'm surprised I've just seen a flacid peen on Youtube. I didn't hate the experience.
O.o
Sorry, but this is why I hate drunks. Yes, I'm being a sanctimonious bitch, but yeah.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
Eventhough it's unedited, it's a small screen (for me) there is no peen definition for me. So I'm all good here!!
*hit's the widescreen option*
I guess this douchebag is "Passenger Yellow". This is my first time seeing him. Why didn't he just tell the security guy that he had to go?
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
this guy's a mess, he was arrested last month on meth and coke possession. so much for dispelling the whole drunk native american stereotype.
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:18pm.
I bet that industrial carpet burn on his peenor
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ahahahaha PEENOR? Well, I now have my word of the day.
unbelievable. who raised this person? What proud parents they must be...
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And I kept touching my neck
To guide your eyes where I wanted you to kiss me
When we find some time alone
Unedited video, people. NSFW. Learned that the hard way!
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"Submitted by suckandfuck on Fri, 04/16/2010 - 5:46pm.
I would slaughter a thousand babies for an hour alone with Mike Rowe."
I use to live with a guy who got so drunk he opened the fridge door and peed all over my eggs. MY EGGS! Rotten egg peeing bastard.
Look Ma! No hands!!
It seems he may be a grower, not a shower.
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:55pm.
I agree with ME. If this dude was black, KK would have been ALL OVER THAT!
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if dude was black, we'd be talking about a police shooting in LAX.
"He was holding something long and dark in his hand - I was afraid for my life! I had no choice but to shoot!"
Officers cleared of all charges.
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God don't like ugly.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:47pm.
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:43pm.
Paquita- Did it last year- enjoy!
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and I am the only motherfucker that has not seen them... may your vibrator short out mid-gasm.
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They're big, they're round and they're awesome.
*flicks your mushroom cap*
LAX spokeswhore: "This was outrageous! We don't expect this behavior beyond the Air France gate area."
LMAO!!!! That is the video of the year!!!
I mean, damn, there's drunk and then there's CRAZY DRUNK!
Why did the cop take him down? He didn't finish peeing... and that was the longest pee EVER!
When you are so drunk that you don't remember peeing, you need rehab.
And a good way to get out of the limelight for a while and blame your actions on an "illness".
I don't know who he is, but that's the best performance ever!
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"That shit was more staged and choreographed than Paul Ryan's soup kitchen visit."- MK, 10/16/12
I agree with ME. If this dude was black, KK would have been ALL OVER THAT!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by Paquita on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:51pm.
just let me know at least a day in advance.
OT - I like the first guy, the one that kinda balanced him vs. the cop who is obviously ghey
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" Can I wear the Scream mask? The mask from Scream... when I do you from behind..." ~ Kenny Powers
Submitted by suckandfuck on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:02pm.
I can picture Kim Kardashian dragging her ass all over that spot like a dog over a carpet.
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BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHAHAHAHHA!!!!!
I love Sucky.
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:43pm.
Paquita- Did it last year- enjoy!
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Thanks!
jack. I will sure send all the requirements. You should come with me to my first doc's appointment, since you are the expert hahaha
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Don't blame me! I voted for Kodos!
I see the name, clicked the link and still say, WHO?
Drunk, methed out mess.
Jacko- Don't you curse a bored housewife's little helpers, you one eyed cretin!
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If I see something I haven't seen before, I'll throw a dollar at it.
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:43pm.
Paquita- Did it last year- enjoy!
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and I am the only motherfucker that has not seen them... may your vibrator short out mid-gasm.
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" Can I wear the Scream mask? The mask from Scream... when I do you from behind..." ~ Kenny Powers