Mo’Nique Isn’t Done Talking About Getting Blackballed By Lee Daniels

In case you haven’t been keeping up on this feud between Mo’Nique and the director of Precious Lee Daniels, let me try to give you the Cliffs Notes version. Mo’Nique told The Hollywood Reporter that not too long ago, she was told by Lee Daniels that she’s been blackballed by Hollywood for not playing the game (aka not sucking enough ass). Mo’Nique said that she was supposed to be in Empire and the role that Oprah played in The Butler was hers, but Lee snatched that shit away from her. Lee responded to Mo’Nique’s blackballed claim by basically confirming that she’s been blackballed by him. Mo’Nique kept the fight going by saying that she thinks Lee Daniel’s b-hole got twisted when she didn’t thank him by name during her Oscar speech. She also said that he offered her the role of Cookie in Empire (insert CookieIsNotAmused.GIF here). Empire’s co-creator Danny Strong said on Twitter that the role of Cookie was always meant for Taraji P. Henson. Mo’Nique clapped back once again by claiming she has e-mails proving she was offered that role. This shit is more melodramatic than that scene in Precious where Mo’Nique ruins a perfectly good TV by dropping it on Gabourey Sidibe in that stairwell.

Lee Daniels has stayed quiet since farting up that response to Mo’Nique, but she’s not done. Mo’Nique took her “I WILL NOT BE BLACKBALLED” tour to TMZ  yesterday. Mo’Nique told Harvey Levin that she didn’t get the role of Cookie because FOX was told that she’s as difficult as an incontinent shark (I don’t know what that means either). Mo’Nique is not afraid of Lee Daniels even though he is a power player in Hollywood.

Stop the madness, Mo’Nique!

Part of me thinks that is a STUNT QUEEN stunt and if that’s not the case, then she needs to hit the brakes on this shit. At this point, it seems like only Lee Daniels’ dramatic ass has “blackballed” her, but if she keeps going, the only job offer she’ll get is to join the cast of Bowling with the Stars in Greenland. If she put as much blood, sweat, tears and drama into her Oscar campaign as she is into this campaign against Lee Daniels, she might not have bitches mad at her. And I’m sure Lee Daniels is going to turn this whole saga into a show called Blackballed and he’ll offer Mo’Nique the role of Mo’Nique before snatching it away and giving it to Oprah.

Mo’Nique Says She Was “Blackballed” From Hollywood For Not Playing The Game

When Mo’Nique won the Best Supporting Actress Oscar in 2010 for Precious, she used her time on stage to throw two burning hot side-eyes at the Oscar campaign game by thanking the Academy for showing that it can be about the performance and not about politics. During Oscar campaign time, Mo’Nique didn’t go to many events and she refused to use her lips to suck on the ass flaps of voters to get that trophy in her hands. She was the anti-Benedict Cumberbatch. After her win, all the doors she thought were going to open up because of her win never opened. And just a few months ago she was told by Lee Daniels, the director of Precious, that if Hollywood was John Travolta, then she’d big a big old pussy, because nobody wants to touch her.

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Did Mo’Nique Shave Her Legs???!???

Maybe the Purecaf I inject directly into my temples every morning has yet to hit my brain, but is that a fresh field of stubble on Mo’Nique’s legs at the Oscar nomination ceremony in Beverly Hills this morning? Mo’Nique has long been a champion for the “FUCK RAZORS“ movement, so there must be a good reason for why she let a lady BIC scoot against her body. And by a “good reason” I mean A CHECK with a bountiful amount of zeros on it. I’d like to think that Mo’Nique didn’t make it easy. They had to hold Mo’Nique down on a sticky bed of NADS, play Jewel’s “Intuition“ backwards and threaten her with an Epilator if she didn’t let them shave her legs.

About that Epilator, one day we’ll have to talk about all the unfortunate experiences I’ve had with that devil tool. But I don’t know if we’ll ever get to have that conversation. The world is definitely changing for the worst now that Mo’Nique is no longer shampooing and conditioning her leg fur every evening.

But Where Was The Award For Mimi’s Stache?

This weekend in Los Angeles, there’s going to be an award show held every damn half hour. I think Denny’s is giving out their Rooty Tooty Fresh In Movies Awards this afternoon (hosted by Kirstie Alley’s nutritionist). Last night was the Independent Spirit Awards, which honors independent spirits or some shit.

Precious was the big (no pun intended) last night picking up a million awards for Best Picture, Best Director, Best Actress for Gabourey Sidibe, Best Supporting Actress for Mo’nique, Best Screenplay, and Best Performance By A Plate of Hairy Pig’s Feet (which surprisingly did not go to Mimi). Unfortunately, those dumb bitches didn’t give a nod to Mimi’s stache, which was the real star of that movie. However, Mimi still showed up to sprinkle her Hello Kitty ho-ness all over the event….and because she heard the bottle pop.

Other awards went to Jeff Bridges in Cray-Cray Heart for Best Actor and Woody Harrelson in The Messenger for Best Supporting Actor.

And now for pictures! In order: Mimi, Maggie GyllenSAAG with Peter Sarsgaard, Pierce Brosnan with his wife Keely, Roger Ebert with his wife Chaz, The Beaver Director Jodie Foster (that’s her new full name now), Mo’nique (and her furry caterpillar stems) with her husband Sidney, Carey Mulligan, Gabourey Sidibe, Mena Suvari, Lenny Kravitz with his daughter Zoe, Jason Stackhouse from True Blood, Jennifer Grey (A MESS), John Waters and Jeff Bridges.

Mo’Nique On Her Open Marriage And Furry Legs

When it comes to Mo’Nique’s husband passing that peen around, she says she doesn’t have a problem with it. But when it comes to a razor touching her hairy limbs, Mo’Nique says, “Fuck no!”

During Barbara Walters Oscar Special (which airs on Sundee), Mo’Nique said that she hasn’t effed a dude outside of her marriage, but she wouldn’t divorce her husband if he stuck it in another bitch. Mo’Nique explained, “Could Sid have sex outside of his marriage with me? Yes. That’s not a deal-breaker. That’s not something that would make us say, ‘Pack your things and let’s end the marriage. What if it’s 20 times? So what? We’ve been best friends for over 25 years, and we truly know who we are. Oftentimes, people get into marriages and they don’t know who they’re laying next to. I’m very comfortable and secure with my husband.”

Whatever works for you is what I say. If Mo’Nique doesn’t care if her husband comes home smelling like foreign vagina, strawberry lube and strange sperm, then more power to her. Who cares what others say. DO YOU…..even if your husband is off doing everybody else.

And you’re wrong if you think that Mo’Nique’s husband might run off to somebody else’s bed because of her hairy legs. Mo’Nique says that her husband loves the fact that her legs look like Robin Williams’ dick: “He loves the hairy legs and if Sid likes the hairy legs, there you go. I tried shaving one time, and it was so uncomfortable and painful. I said never again would I do that to myself. I’m 42 and I’m very hairy.”