Category: Bruce Jenner
Bruce Jenner Comes Out As Transgender
After months of rumors and tricks (this trick including) thinking that Bruce Jenner’s interview with Diane Sawyer might be a big STUNT QUEEN stunt to promote whatever Pimp Mama Kris wants promoted, Bruce bravely came out as transgender and said the words, “I am a woman.” I live in the past that is the West Coast, so the interview isn’t airing right now, but thank the fuck for whoever invented the Internet, high-speed, computers, etc., because now I don’t have to wait a million years to watch Bruce pull out his pony, shake his mane and give us “I am woman, hear me roar.”
Bruce told Diane that this is the last interview he will do as “Bruce” and he’s ready to fully live his life as a woman. (Note: ABC News says that at the time of his interview with Diane, Bruce said that he still wanted to be addressed as a “he” and “him,” so that’s why I’m doing it.)
“I would say I’ve always been very confused with my gender identity since I was this big. I tried to explain it, because I’ve had all my kids sitting in that chair … and I’ve tried to explain it this way. God’s looking down, making little Bruce … he says ‘Okay, what are gonna do with this one. Make him a smart kid, very determined … and then when he’s just finishing he says, ‘Let’s wait a second.’ God looks down and chuckles a little bit and says, ‘Hey, let’s give him the soul of a female.’
“Bruce lives a lie. She is not a lie,” Jenner said. “I can’t do it anymore.”
Bruce cackled when Diane told him that some people think the interview was a stunt to promote a reality show. Bruce told her that he wouldn’t go through everything he’s going through to promote a reality show. (Somewhere, PMK watched that and yelled at that screen, “That is the most hurtful thing you’ve ever said, Bruce!” ) Bruce said that the first person he told was his first wife Christy. When Diane asked if he’s gay, Bruce once again laughed and said that he’s strictly clitly. He’s never been with a dude and is still into women.
As for PMK, Bruce says that he was taking hormones 5 years before he got with her and he had 36C chichis at the time. She knew he was taking hormones and knew about his cross-dressing. Bruce didn’t say any bad shit about PMK and said that he “loved” her. ABC asked all three of Bruce’s ex-wives for a comment and the only one who didn’t give one was PMK. She had no comment. In PMK’s defense, it’s kind of impossible to comment as she’s screaming into a pillow because Bruce is getting all the attention.
UPDATE: After Perez Hilton called her out for not saying shit on Twitter, PMK tweeted this.
Does she kiss Lucifer’s ass lips with that mouth?! ABC claims that they e-mailed her PR team several times and was finally told that she had no comment. And you know the Bruce she’s sitting with isn’t Bruce Jenner. It’s some dude named Bruce she picked up at a bar and plans to suck the life out of later.
Bruce Jenner Has Been Waiting For This His Entire Life
Bruce Jenner’s 2-hour interview with Diane Sawyer is a little over a week away, but ABC is already milking the hell out of it like it’s a Kardashian vagina and the interview is a black dick. Everyone has reported that Bruce will use the interview to go public about his transition and will talk about the process. But the Kartrashians have been very vague about Bruce’s “journey” and so has ABC. The first promo didn’t even show his face and the second one, which ABC pushed out today, is still pretty vague. The voiceover dude brings the drama in heavy doses and I want him to narrate my life, because he’d make it sound way more interesting than it is. “Michael…… Getting out of bed…. Walking to the bathroom… Pissing while picking his eye crusties out… The journey… The decisions…”
In this second promo, Bruce Jenner actually speaks! And he doesn’t say much.
If you didn’t watch it, the only thing Bruce says is, “My whole life has been getting me ready for this.”
Because Bruce hasn’t yet said himself that he’s transitioning, some people don’t believe that’s what this interview is about. I do think Bruce is transitioning and believe that’s what this interview is about, but the promos have been so damn vague that I wouldn’t be too surprised if he said, “My whole life has been getting me ready for this. Diane, I am transitioning… from… a former track and field athlete to a competitive toy helicopter racer!” The end. Roll credits as Pimp Mama Kris cackles.
Jamie Foxx Came For Bruce Jenner At The iHeartRadio Music Awards
Jamie Foxx hosted the iHeartRadio Music Awards in LA last night, and joked about Bruce Jenner transitioning. Here’s what he said. Let me know if you agree with me that Jamie might be stuck in 1986 in his head.
“He’s doing a his and her duet all by himself.”
He’s so edgy. If you’re going to kick a man while he’s going through something, at least make it funny and/or daring. Hell, I’d be more impressed if you joked about him possibly killing Grandma. Or go for his taste in women. That’s some tired “Open Mike Night” down at the Laff Hut shit for a multimillionaire hosting an awards show. Earn your money, Wanda. Just because Bruce is becoming the ethereal beauty that you will never be or hope to claim as your own, it doesn’t mean you should vent your jealousy by appealing to the transphobic dickfucks (like Pimp Mama Kris) out there.
He also made a joke about how he was busting Bruce Jenner’s balls while he still had them. Fist Brown thought it was hilarious, sitting in the audience all tattooed and purple-haired, looking like Grimace’s girlfriend’s partial abortion. Remain seated, Fist.
Humanity isn’t thrilled with Jamie Fuxx’s (typo and don’t even think it’s not stayin’) lil’ gag, either. CNN posted viewer Tweets slapping him down for his insensitivity.
The only good to come out of this is that Jamie’s lame joke totally reminded me of this visual and audio candy from whenst I was but a child. I can remember thinking that magic was real!
Check out Jamie Fuxx (I’m starting to like that typo) at the iHeart Radio Awards below.
The Police Want Bruce Jenner’s Phone Records To See If He Was Texting While Driving
The Los Angeles Times says that detectives and traffic investigators will look over Bruce Jenner’s cell phone records to find out whether or not he was texting something like “H8 U BITCH” to Pimp Mama Kris before hitting another car on PCH in Malibu yesterday. As most of you know, the multi-car accident killed the 69-year-old woman in the car that Bruce hit. Bruce passed a sobriety test at the scene and later took a blood test to prove that the sweet nectar wasn’t running through his veins while driving.
Yesterday, there was rumors that the paparazzi were chasing the only tolerable member of the Jenner-Kartrashian klan of fame whores, but officials say that the paps didn’t play a part in the crash. The paparazzi were following Bruce, but he wasn’t trying to outrun them. The sadness all started when a Prius stopped suddenly for whatever reason. The Lexus hit the Prius and Bruce, who was driving a Cadillac Escalade, tried to avoid hitting the Lexus and swerved, hitting the right side of it. That caused the Lexus to shoot off into oncoming traffic where it was hit by a Hummer. The woman driving the Lexus died at the scene. Five other people were injured in the crash.
TMZ doesn’t think that Bruce will be charged with anything and they don’t think he was texting while driving. They posted a series of pictures of Bruce behind the Lexus and the moment he hit it. In the pictures taken before he rear-ended the Lexus, he’s holding a cigarette, not a cell phone. Apparently, deputies believe the Prius is at fault for stopping all of a sudden. (My guess is that the Prius was trying to make a u-turn on PCH which is a total act of crazy.) Radar says that Bruce isn’t taking any chances and is allegedly looking for a criminal lawyer in case he’s charged with manslaughter.
I squinted at the pictures over at TMZ and that cigarette in Bruce’s hand kind of looks like the joint I sucked on last night. I’m sure it was a cigarette, but if it was a joint, the blood test will show that. ….Unless Pimp Mama Kris gets one of her minions to sneak into the lab and switch Bruce’s blood out with the pristine blood of the virgins she sucks on.
Pics: FameFlynet, Splash
Bruce Jenner Was Involved In A Car Crash That Has Left One Person Dead (UPDATE)
Well, this is all kinds of sad. TMZ says that while driving on the Pacific Coast Highway (I’m starting to think nothing good happens on the PCH) around noon today, Bruce Jenner was involved in a 3-vehicle crash that has left one person dead and seven injured. Several eyewitness say the crash was caused by Bruce rear-ending the car in front of him, which pushed the car into the wrong lane of traffic and then struck by an oncoming Hummer. The woman driving the car he rear-ended was killed. Seven others are being treated for injuries ranging from minor to moderate. Bruce is reportedly fine.
Sources close to the Jenner family say that Bruce told the police he was being chased by paparazzi when he rear-ended the car in front of him, and that he wasn’t drinking. TMZ says he was given a sobriety test, which he passed.
UPDATE: TMZ says Bruce volunteered to go to the hospital and let the police take a sample of his blood for a blood alcohol test. They’re also saying that the woman’s vehicle was coming to a stop at a red light when Bruce rear-ended her.
Bruce Jenner’s “Journey” Will Be An E! Reality Show
When Kummy Kakes said Bruce Jenner was on a “journey” and said that he’ll tell his story, she meant to say that he’ll tell his story in front of E!’s cameras as soon as Pimp Mama Kris finishes brokering the deal and gets as much money as possible.
TMZ and UsWeekly says that for months and months E!’s cameras have been following Bruce around as he slowly begins to change his outside. TMZ’s post is very vague and they didn’t come out and say that Bruce is physically transitioning into a woman, but UsWeekly did. One of Bruce Jenner’s “friends” tells UsWeekly (via Gossip Cop) that he has been seeing doctors and is ready to go public with his transition. The friend says that Bruce was ready to fully let out his inner woman in 1990, but Pimp Mama Kris being the evil killer of dreams and hopes that she is, told him not do to it. But now that he’s no longer married to the mutated fart of Lucifer that possessed a wax Michael Jackson figure, he can let his hair down and live life. via Gossip Cop
Jenner is said to be now taking estrogen hormones, even as soon-to-be ex-wife Kris has “refused to accept the truth.” Us Weekly says the momager remains in “denial,” and quotes its source as saying “she has made no attempts to understand” what Jenner is going through.
In addition to what Us Weekly says is a “tell-all interview,” the magazine reports Jenner will also have an E! show “highlighting his desire to live as a woman and look like one.”
TMZ says that Kim, Khloe, Kourtney Kendall, Kylie, Krusty, Kweefy and whatever the other ones names are support Bruce, but PMK “lost it” at one point while he talked to his family about the changes in his life. How can she lose it when she never had it?
I never totally bought into the rumors that Bruce is transitioning. Part of me figured that Bruce subscribed to Siegfried and Roy’s brand of man glamour and discovered a love for having flowing locks and plumped up lips. But if it is true and he is showing his transition in front of the cameras, then I really can’t wait for the scene where Bruce breaks the black magic spell that PMK put on him by telling her that he’s going to do what he wants to do and she screams while melting into a puddle of black sludge. That’s going to be Emmy worthy.
And here’s PMK and Kendull Jenner at LAX yesterday.
