Sookeh Is Bi

When I first read the headline, “True Blood Stars Says ‘I’m Bi-Sexual,‘ my genitals went numb thinking that Alexander Skarsgard announced to the world that everyone has a chance at his scalding hot Swedish blodkorv and meatballs! Well, my no-no will continue to hold its breath (don’t visual that), because ASkars isn’t the True Blood star who has come out as a bi-sexual. Anna Paquin is the one who announced that she loves the cock and the cooch.

In a PSA for the True Colors Fund, Sookeh proudly says, “I’m Anna Paquin. I’m bisexual, and I give a damn.” Radar has the video if you want to see it for yourself. A source also tells Radar that nobody at the shoot knew Anna was going to make that statement.

Sookeh is currently engaged to Vampire Beeeeeeehl.

Now back to Askars, we’re waiting…..

Tardy For The Pussy Party

A few days ago there was a not-so-blind item about a certain Real Housewife dropping the dick and picking up the puss. Everyone pretty much assumed it was the one and only Kim Zolciak of the Real Housewives of Atlanta. UsWeekly is now co-signing that shit by saying that Kim publicly stepped out with her girlfriend of 3 months DJ Tracy Young at the Blacks’ Annual Gala in Miami Beach on Saturday. This is like Sally Beauty Supply’s answer to Lindsay Lohan and SamRo.

Apparently, Kim was telling everyone how happy she is with DJ Tracy. A source said, “Tracy broke up with her longtime girlfriend to be with Kim. Since they’ve been together, Tracy lost a lot of weight and got really skinny for Kim. They seem to be beyond happy with each other. The rumor is that Kim Zolciak will come out this season.”

DJ Tracy seems like a perfectly lovely gayelle. If you squint your eyes while rubbing your uterus area, she almost looks like a softer version of Kate Gosselin. So why is she fucking around with broke down Kim? It can’t be fun having to constantly scrub wig glue off of your inner thighs. And it probably takes more than a few swigs of Listerine to get the taste of Kim’s ash tray-flavored snatch out of your mouth.

I’m just going to say this is a publicity stunt that needs more funding. I mean, just last week Kim was telling a radio station that she was back on Big Poppa’s payroll. Besides, we all know Sheree is supposed to be the cooch munchin’ one! Bitch has the jaw for it (just pretend you know what that means).

Just The 12 Of Us

Rosie O’Donnell has been dating her new girlfriend Tracy Kachtick-Anders for approximately 6-minutes (that’s around 2 years in gayelle time), and she’s already making plans to move her into her home.

Rosie O tells Oprah that as soon as she laid eyes on Tracy, her vag popped and her Home Depot credit card melted, “So she got out of the car in Miami and I was, like, zoinks, you know, because she’s absolutely gorgeous and, I don’t know, I felt like I knew her right away. It was very odd.”

When Oprah asked Rosie if she wants Tracy to live with her, Gayle King burst into tears and ran out of the studio. But they all ignored her, and Rosie answered, “Yes, as soon as we can arrange the kids’ thing where she lives in Texas, you know.”

They’re gonna need a bigger EVERYTHING, because Rosie has 4 kids and Tracy has 6. It’s like The Brady Bunch: Lesbian Edition. The Dykey Bunch! Actually, scratch that, because I think the original Brady Bunch was the lesbian version. Those were both gayelles, right?

via People

Mery Streep & Sandy Bullock: Leeeeeez Be Friends Forever!

Leading up to the Oscars, there’s ten million award shows where hos slip into something sparkly, spray their wet parts with perfume and make sure their titties sit up real nice. And I’m just talking about the dudes. Anyway, last night the hos of Hollywood wore their prom best for the Critics Choice Awards, which honors blah blah in blah blah for blah blah.

When Bradley Cooper opened the envelope to announce the winner of Best Actress in a Film, he declared that it was a TIE! Sandy Bullock (for The Blind Side) and Meryl Streep (for Julie & Julia) both won. Sandy must have left her chola attitude in George Lopez’s green room, because if she still had it with her, she would’ve taken a razor out of her hair and cut Meryl.

Instead, Sandy and Meryl kissed like the Simpson family on Christmas morning. Well, almost like the Simpson family. Sandy didn’t use tongue. Sandy doesn’t even kiss her husband with tongue before the sun sets, so it’s not surprising that she didn’t French on Meryl.

Here’s hoping that Sandy and Meryl have started a trend. At this Sunday’s Golden Globes, I’m crossing my ass lips that George Clooney and Colin Firth tie for Best Actor. And if they do, they better take those panties off and touch tongues! It’s the new way. Hell, I’d even settle for Morgan Freeman and Jeff Bridges.

Below is the clip of Meryl and Sandy’s G-rated lezzie lip-lock.

And here’s some pictures of hos from last night’s show including: Tom Ford, Julianne Moore, John Cho, Zachary Quinto, an escaped grizzly bear from the zoo, Emily Blunt, Sandy B, Kristin Chenoweth, Marion Cotillard, Purdy Zac Efron, Morgan Freeman with his ladyfreeend, Heather Graham, some virgin, Edward Gayhands, Heather Mills’ voodoo doll, Mo’Nique with her piece, Carey Mulligan, Zoe Saldana and Gabourey Sidibe.

Rosie O’s New Piece Has A Child Army Of Her Very Own

The ladyfriend Rosie O’Donnell was spotted holding hands with the other day is her new bagina bumpin’ lover. And the woman sounds like even St. Angie bows down before her halo. That was served without any sarcasm. Not a drop. I know, mark this day in your calendars.

People reports that Rosie’s partner in pussy is Tracy Kachtick-Anders, an artiste from Texas. Tracy is also the founder of the Open Arms Campaign, a non-profit that brings together foster kids with gay and gayelle families. Tracy is the mother of six kids. Five are adopted and several of them have special needs.

The two met online through Rosie’s blog. Tracy posted some comment that made Rosie’s clit stand up and pay attention. The rest is lezzie history.

It’s a good thing that Tracy is a mother to six kids. That means she’ll know exactly what to do when Rosie throws one of her major dyketrums.

Rosie O’s New Partner In Pussy?

Rosie O’Donnell really hasn’t been seen with a new piece since splitting up with her longtime partner a few months ago, but here she is strolling through Miami with a ladyfriend. A ladyfriend who she may or may not be clapping clits with in the early morning hours.

But good for Rosie if her ladyfriend is munchin’ the socks right off of her. Actually, I hope Rosie’s ladyfriend is eating her Dorito pie until those evil CROCS go flying off her feet and land in a trash can. If her ladyfriend can do that, she should get a damn Nobel Peace Prize.

I’m sure Rosie wears CROCS because it feels like her feet are in the middle of a vagina sandwich. But it would be much more attractive if she walked around with two silicone pussies on her feet instead.