The FAA Is Investigating Harrison Ford’s Latest Airplane Oops

April 29, 2020 / Posted by:

Uh oh! Sex grandpa Harrison Ford did a whoopsies on a plane again! Nope, he didn’t pull a Gérard Depardieu. He taxied across the runway after being told not to by the tower operator. I assumed it was some bad boy Han Solo shit, but Harrison just misunderstood the operator’s orders. The incident occurred last Friday, right after the 77-year-old amateur pilot landed his plane at Hawthorne Airport, near Los Angeles.

TMZ has the audio:

OK, I tried really hard to accurately transcribe the incident, but their technical plane speak is waaay too garbled and fast. Here’s what I picked up:

Sex Grandpa: Hotel uniform, ho-tay Hotel.

Tower Man: (real fast) Hotel uniform, can you hold short on runway 2-5? Traffic down the runway.

Sex Grandpa: (begins crossing the runway) Crossing 2-5. Ehhh, and a hotel uniform.

Tower Man: (very angry, kinda sexy) Hotel uniform! Get across that runway now! I told you to hold short, you need to listen up!

Sex Grandpa: (internally freaks out) Uh, excuse me, sir, I thought exactly the opposite. I’m terribly sorry!

At first I was all, “Stop gabbing about hotel uniforms, boys, it’s no time for fashion talk!”, before realizing it’s army alphabet speak for “H-U” (the last two letters of Harrison’s plane’s tail number).

Harrison was told to hold his plane because there was another plane that was practicing touch-and-go landings on that same runway. However, there wasn’t any danger of a crash. The other plane was 3,600 feet away from Harrison, and he was in the airway before he would have reached the other end of the runway (where Harrison was crossing).

Still, since planes are big, scary freaks of nature, it’s a pretty big whoopsie. TMZ says The Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) is investigating.

Harrison’s rep told TMZ:

“Mr. Ford crossed the airport’s only runway in his aircraft after he misheard a radio instruction from ATC. He immediately acknowledged the mistake and apologized to ATC for the error. The purpose of the flight was to maintain currency and proficiency of the aircraft.”

Harrison’s currently updating his pilot’s license so he can do more relief work. He’s done missions to Haiti, worked with Doctors Without Borders, and helped rescue stranded hikers.

Obviously this isn’t the first time Harrison’s had a scary airplane situation. In 2017, he almost mistakenly landed his plane on a taxiway, nearly colliding with a jet full of people. Two years before that, he was forced to crash land on a golf course when his plane’s engine failed. The crash was serious; he spent three weeks in a hospital.

Sigh. What I would have given to be Harrison’s sex-nurse. Seriously, in case you can’t tell, Mr. Ally McBeal is my #1 for life. Indiana Jones? Dr. Richard Kimble? Han “Sploosh” Solo?! Harrison better be careful in the sky, because if he dies, sex dies!


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