February’s Hot Slut Of The Month Is….

Billy Porter’s Oscars Tuxedo Gown!

Seen above riding away from the Oscars on his royal chariot while all of the trophies the winners gave to him for stealing the show are safely tucked under his majestic gown of velvet perfection, Billy Porter can add another illustrious title to his resume: Hot Slut of the Month winner! Well, technically, his Christian Siriano-made tuxedo gown has won that title.

At last month’s Oscars, Billy Porter became the sole reason why stylists ended up with a red palm print on their face. They all got slapped down by their clients who were pissing shit over being shown up by Billy Porter and his black velvet, if you please, regalness. And this month, Billy Porter’s Oscar Tuxedo Gown is February’s Hot Slut of the Month with 64% of your votes. It easily blew away the competition with a twirl. It beat Roper and Cricket (22%), the “After These Messages” singers (8%), and Olive Garden’s breadstick bouquet (6%).

Billy Porter’s Oscar Tuxedo Gown will now go on to the Hot Slut of 2019 semi-finals. Thank you to all who voted! And if you’ve ever got a HSOTD idea that you don’t think I’ve done, put on a pair of gloves before shoving it into my inbox.

Pic: Instagram