Category: X Æ A-12

Elon Musk And Grimes’s Baby Finally Has A Legal Name

June 2, 2020 / Posted by:

When Elon Musk and Grimes’ baby first entered this world a month ago, his parents gave him the name X Æ A-12 Musk. Then the state of California harshed Elon and Grimes’s cool parent vibe by having a little rule about naming your kid with letters and ligatures. So then it was revealed that his new name would be X Æ A-Xii, which was a bit more acceptable, but still not totally legal in the eyes of California. The Blast got their hands on a copy of Musk Baby’s birth certificate, and after an annoying amount of confusing updates from both his parents, he shall henceforth be known as: X AE A-Xii Musk.

Continue reading

Elon Musk Corrected Grimes’ Explanation Of The Origin Of X Æ A-12’s Name

May 6, 2020 / Posted by:

As it was foretold, the mysteries of the universe have been explained to us from on high by a species of superior intellect, and with that elucidation comes the crushing realization that our puny minds are too weak and feeble to truly comprehend its significance. Even so, Grimes has deemed us worthy recipients of the key to deciphering the name of her child, X Æ A-12. The child’s mortal yet (allegedly) gifted father, Elon Musk (remember when Grimes told Azealia Banks he had a big dick and Azaelia said, no, your pussy just too small? I hope they have qualified child therapists on Mars), only corrected her on one small detail. Apparently space goth aliens, with all their great knowledge of the cosmos, still can’t tell the difference between SR-17 and SR-71 CIA reconnaissance jets. Cut her some slack, Elon. She’s not from around here!

Continue reading

alt="drupal analytics" >