Category: Linda Perry

QOTD: Linda Perry Calls Out Beyonce’s “Songwriting” Skills

July 17, 2014 / Posted by:

Some pop stars will take a song they didn’t write at all and change one tiny lyric so they can get the songwriting credit, because: 1) The throbbing, pus-filled ego monster that lives inside of them tells them that the song is nothing without them and; 2) The throbbing, pus-filled greed monster that also lives inside of them wants that royalty money. Beyonce is known for pulling that trick. So during a Reddit AMA (via Vulture) to promote her new Vh1 show Make or Break, songwriter and 4 Non-Blonder Linda Perry was asked what she thinks about hos pulling that shit. As the BumbleBeys of the Beehive prepared their stingers for attack, she spit this out.

Linda, how do you feel about Beyonce changing one word on a song and getting writing credit. Does that bother you as a songwriter?

well hahaha um thats not songwriting but some of these artists believe if it wasnt for them your song would never get out there so they take a cut just because they are who they are. but everyone knows the real truth even Beyonce. She is talented but in a completely different way

That statement is dripping with pure, potent, sickening jealousy! The chola Erykah Badu is obviously just jealous of Beyonce’s impeccable writing skills, because she wishes she wrote the classic Christmas song Silent Night,  the haunting Ave Maria and the disco masterpiece Emotion like Beyonce did! How dare Linda Perry come for little, old songwriting artist Beyonce. I mean, Beyonce obviously writes her own songs. We all saw her scribble in her notebook in that insufferable propaganda piece masquerading as an HBO documentary!

Darlene Conner And Linda Perry Got Married

March 31, 2014 / Posted by:

People says that somewhere in California yesterday, 40-year-old Sara Gilbert (Side note: Yes, a single white hair grows out of your ass lips when you read the words “39-year-old Sara Gilbert.” It’s a natural reaction) started on the road to wedded misery with the chick from 4 Non Blondes. All together now: And I say haaaaaaaaaaaaaaay-yaaaay-yaaay-yay-yay-haaaaaay-yaaay-yaaay, I say, hay, congrats, bitches!

Darlene Conner and 49-year-old Linda Perry starting bumpin’ ‘ginas full-time around 3 years ago after Darlene got out of a really long relationship. Linda proposed to Darlene last year. UsWeekly says that Juliette Lewis was at their wedding, but other than that, there’s no other details and I know that’s making you prop up your eyelids with toothpicks, because you can’t close them without knowing every detail about Darlene Conner’s wedding. So let’s just assume that Becky #1 and #2 were her bridesmaids, her something borrowed was a tuxedo made out of Roseanne’s chicken shirt, Dan walked her down the aisle while wearing his baby blue bathrobe and DJ watched it all from the children’s table where he belongs. Afterward, Sara Gilbert gave a special toast to Johnny Galecki for making her wedding possible by turning her into a lesbian with his gayelle-turning lips a million years ago.

And here’s Sara and Linda a couple of weeks ago at an event for L.A.’s Gay and Lesbian Center. Sara did good, because Linda Perry looks like the spawn of Freddy Krueger and a cholo Gelfling and that IS the look.

Pics: Wenn.com

“I’ve Told You Ten Times; No, I Can’t Make You A Methadone-arita”

January 12, 2014 / Posted by:

Last night, The Art of Elysium’s 7th Annual HEAVEN Gala was held in Los Angeles, and despite the fact that the word ‘gala’ is classy shorthand for ‘black tie, motherfuckers’Steven Tyler and Linda Perry showed up looking like chorus members from a Skid Row production of “Hey Gilbert! The Johnny Depp Story”. Now, I’ll cut them some slack, since ‘7th Annual Heaven Gala’ sounds sort of like a 7th Heaven theme party, so maybe they decided to go dressed up as two street kids taken in by Rev. Eric Camden in a lost episode. But none of that makes any goddamned sense, so let’s just call a spade a grimy, itchy-looking, crotch-grabbing spade; these two are a real-life mess. I mean, is that a fucking banana sticker on Steven’s hand? Jesus take the wheel. Take all the wheels.

Here’s more of Steven Tyler and Linda Perry looking like they huffed all the freon out of their limo’s busted mini-fridge on the way over, along with a couple others who looked like they caught Steven and Linda’s second-hand high (Rose McGowan and David Arquette, I’m looking in your direction). And no, not everyone was a damn mess. Some people took the term ‘gala’ seriously, including Evan Rachel Wood, Kate Bosworth (wearing a dress that – you know what? You guys take this one), Camilla BelleBusy Philipps (Kim Kelly FOREVER), and Harry Hamlin and Lisa Rinna (who should put on some SPF50, because I offer no shade – bitch looks good. Wait, did I just say that? Have I been huffing freon too?)

(Pics via Wenn)

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And I Say Haaaaay Yay Yay A A Haaaay Yay Yay!

November 28, 2011 / Posted by:

“Darlene Conner! Pull your hand away from Lindsay Lohan’s probably STD-infected leftover!” is a line that filled the thought bubble above my head after this picture touched my eyes, because I swear on the box of dusty dildos in the back of my closet that I thought this was Sara Gilbert and SamRo walking the streets together. I know all those twiggy lesbians in skinny jeans and beanies look the same to me. Call me racist. But thanks be to God Bea Arthur, this isn’t SamRo. Apparently, Sara Gilbert hopped off of her partner of 10 years and landed right on the crotch of 4 Non Blonde’s Linda Perry.

Sara and Linda left some restaurant in West Hollywood yesterday hand-in-hand, which means they’re totally clit wrestling. And by the looks of these pictures, that’s all they’re doing. Sara and Linda have been fucking so much that they don’t even have time to bathe, brush their hair or do laundry. Somebody should tell Sara and Linda that they can fuck in the shower, you know. That’s what a sponge vibrator is for. Duh.

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