Jodie Marsh Shows Wonky How It’s Done

The other day, Wonky McValtrex was out working the stroll looking like a grimey used condom left in the gutter for the water roaches to pick at. Last night in London, Jodie Marsh wore something similar except she looked like a stunning black pearl floating in the golden sea. Jodie has more elegance in one of her pussy pimples than Wonky has in her whole entire body.

It looks like Jodie might have gotten a few new tattoos? Oh wait. I shouldn’t call them tattoo when referring to Jodie. I should call them exquisite pieces of body art. I think one of them is a portrait of Buddy Holly. Buddy must be crying from heaven…because he’s so proud that such a fine creature has paid homage to him.

Here’s a few more of the always demure Jodie leaving a London club after getting a train ran on her in the bathroom last night. I could lay on her memory foam chichis for the rest of my days.

Demure. Graceful. Stunning.

As always, Jodie Marsh looked like a delicate flower freshly plucked from the Garden of Eden at the premiere of “Daylight Robbery” in London tonight.

I have only have one more thing to say : Christopher Nolan, here is your Catwoman. You’re welcome.

This Is How You Do It

Dear Women of the World,

Please spend the rest of your day carefully studying the stunning creature known as Jodie Marsh. This is how all of you should look on a daily basis. Yes, your coochie might fall into a coma, your titties might spontaneously combust and STDs will flock to you like a moth to a flame, but it would be worth it.

This is the epitome of grace and beauty. If I was a woman, a biological woman, I would wear this outfit every second of the day. Jodie Marsh is what all of you should aspire to be.

Also, please petition for Jodie to play Catwoman in the next Batman movie. They will have to change her character name to SmellyCatwoman, but Jodie can pull it off.

Thank you.

Love, Kisses and Lucite,
Michael K

Jodie Marsh Talks About Her New Fake Tits

Natural beauty Jodie Marsh talked to GMTV this morning about her reasons for getting ass cheeks permanently planted on her chest. Jodie took her titties to a 32GG (double the gross) because she was tired of wearing push-up bras.

She said, “You know what, I’ll tell you the honest truth – because I did have quite big boobs, natural big boobs and, as any woman with big boobs knows, they don’t stay pert and firm forever – they don’t. ­­And of course, when gravity takes it toll, you’re left with boobs that really only look good in a push up bra – which is what mine had become. And I’d got to a point where I was like, I want them to look like this all the time, I don’t want to have to keep pushing them up.”

29-year-old Jodie also told her plastic surgeon she “didn’t want them to be ridiculous.”

Personally, I think they are too small. Each breast should be at least twice the size of her own head or why even bother going under the knife!?

Source

Thanks Lucinda

Such A Lady

This is definitely the most clothes I’ve ever seen Jodie Marsh wear. She looks like she’s about to have tea with the Queen. A fucking lady. She also looks like she’s smuggling two watermelons in a picnic tablecloth. I can’t believe this ho got another tit job. What she really needs is a schnoze tune-up. That nose looks like it’s been dick slapped one too many times. That being said, she’s still a stunning and elegant lady.

Here’s Jodie at the “Three and Out” charity premiere tonight in London. That’s funny, because three and out is usually a normal night for Jodie. Three dicks in, three dicks out. Jodie’s boyfriend was her escort this evening. He looks like he speaks fluent douche.