This week, shit in the world of Zayn Malik and Gigi Hadid went from zero to FUCKINGMESS when it was reported that Gigi’s mother, Yolanda Hadid, accused him of striking her during a fight last month. Then we learned that Zayn was charged with four criminal acts of harassment, and ended up taking a plea deal. Zayn pled “no contest” to one account in exchange for 360 days probation and a fine, and he must complete an anger management class, a domestic violence program, and he has to stay away from Yolanda and the security involved in the fight. And now sources are saying that Zayn and Gigi’s relationship has been toxic for a while and that he was dropped by his US record label, RCA Records, for being out of control and that friends are concerned about him smoking tons of “extremely strong cannabis.” I know, someone in the music industry smoking strong strains of the good shit. Snoop Dogg just dropped his joint in shock.
Documents state that on September 29, Zayn and Yolanda got into a fight at his and Gigi’s farm in Pennsylvania, which is reportedly next to Yolanda’s farm. Gigi was not at home at the time because she was in Paris working. The fight was over Zayn and Gigi’s 13-month-old daughter Khai. Sources claim that Yolanda showed up at Zayn’s house unannounced and he didn’t like that. Zayn allegedly called Yolanda a “fucking Dutch slut,” told her to stay away from Khai, screamed, “the fucking sperm came out of my fucking cock,” and shoved her into a dresser. Zayn was on the phone with Gigi at the time of the fight and reportedly told her, in so many words, to handle her mom. A security guard was also there and Zayn allegedly told the guard, “Get the fuck out of my fucking house, copper.” Okay, so when Zayn isn’t talking like a professor of reproductive biology in a Martin Scorcese movie (see: his “fucking sperm” comment), he’s talking like a mobster in an old-timey crime drama (see: his “copper” comment).
Zayn denied hitting Yolanda, but said that he agreed to “not contest claims arising from an argument I had with a family member of my partner’s.”
In unsurprising news, 28-year-old Zayn and 26-year-old Gigi, who were together on and off since 2015, broke up over the fight. But sources tell People that Zayn and Gigi’s relationship was “super toxic” and that Yolanda didn’t like the way he treated Gigi, which led to conflict between Zayn and Yolanda. Us Weekly’s source co-signs People’s source and adds that Zayn and Gigi’s relationship was very “destructive” and that they’ve been having problems for a while. But both People and Us Weekly’s sources say that they’re both good parents and are working on co-parenting. A “source close to Zayn” said this to People:
“Zayn’s an amazing dad, and Gigi has said so. They are not fighting. They are actively and amicably working to find the best way to co-parent now. Yolanda is inserting herself into a situation that does not involve her.”
Even before the fight between Zayn and Yolanda, it sounds like she’d hate him even if he dressed up like a giant lemon, and he’d hate her even if she dressed up like a giant bong packed with “extremely strong cannabis.” Speaking of…
Zayn signed with RCA Records in 2015 after leaving One Direction. His last album for RCA, Nobody Is Listening, came out this past January and peaked at #44 in the US on the Billboard 200 chart. And according to The Sun’s sources, nobody at RCA is listening to Zayn anymore because they dropped him. Sources say that Zayn lives a “hermit-like” life on his farm in Pennsylvania where he smokes “extremely strong cannabis.” That sounds like a dream life to me and would make me calmer than a sloth on Xanax, but not Zayn, apparently. Sources say that Zayn has become hard to work with and so RCA is done with him:
“A lot of people have tried desperately to get Zayn’s life and career back on track, but nothing has worked. So many people who have worked with him have just given up. He’s almost impossible to control or guide. A while ago his label quietly decided it was the end of the line for their relationship, and now this.
He’s not with RCA any more. He’s reached the end of the line with them, just as with so many other people before now — managers, agents, label executives. Loads of people believed he had potential. He’s a talent with good looks and lots of fans. But he’s just too much. Unfortunately, everyone who has tried to rein him in over the years has found it too much. He’s so determined in his behaviour, some fear he won’t be satisfied until his career prospects are totally finished.”
Well, if there’s one piece of trash who is loving this sad situation, it’s the dried splatter of steatorrhea known as Jake Paul. Jake and Gigi Hadid had a Twitter fight over a year ago, and after this news came out, he decided to antagonize Gigi on Twitter and make fun of her. The good news is that both sides can stop fighting for a second to join together and agree that Jake Paul is The Fucking Worst®.