Open Post: Hosted By The End Of The Subway “Fake Tuna” Lawsuit

Well, after Subway tried and failed to give away their sad rubber slivers between sandpaper sandwiches, they got a win. Back in January, it was revealed that the “tuna” at some Subway locations was more like Franken-fish than the actual thing. And after months of speculation and an ensuing lawsuit a judge had finally thrown the entire case out due to lack of evidence.

According to The Takeout, the initial lawsuit was just the beginning of Subway’s troubles and by June the issues still stunk like an old tuna tin baking in the summer heat. The author of the original whistleblowing New York Times article, Julia Carmel, had it tested and the results were confusing, suggesting that it may or may not be tuna. Then there was the fact that since the tuna came into the restaurants so heavily processed it was hard to tell if it was still tuna. This prompted a spokesperson for Subway to release a statement that read in part;

After being presented with information from Subway, the plaintiffs abandoned their original claim that Subway’s tuna product contains no tuna. However, they filed an amended complaint that now alleges our tuna is not 100% tuna and that it is not sustainably caught skipjack and yellowfin tuna.

By July Subway created a website called Subwaytunafacts.com as their way of saying “Now look, we tired of telling y’all this shit is fish dammit!” And apparently, their efforts worked because Restaurant Business Online reports the lawsuit has been completely thrown out and Subway can continue serving whatever they consider tuna without any further interruptions.

“To meet the heightened pleading standard, Plaintiffs still need to describe the specific statements they saw and relied upon, when they saw the statements, and where the statements appeared,” the judge wrote, noting the lawsuit had failed to do so.

The plaintiffs have not stated what they believe to be in Subway’s tuna sandwiches if not tuna.

Listen, tossed out lawsuit or not I’m not touching that tuna ever again in my life. And watch how Subway turns this into an opportunity to introduce their new and improved tuna sandwich in a few months with a brand new ingredient; actual tuna.

Pic: Subway