Who cares about THE QUEEN possibly making Prince Charles bust the nut of all nuts from finally handing over her crown and powers to him in two years (and you know that when she does, she’s going to quickly yank ’em back before saying, “SIKE, motherfucker!“). And who also cares about Prince Andrew’s connection to the child-raping dumpster hybrid of Scott Bakula and ALF. The British tabloids are really bringing us the royal news we need to ingest into our brain in order to close our eyelids to sleep tonight.
The Daily Mail says that if you were a lesser at Wimbledon who dared to use your iPhone to take a picture of Duchess Meghan, you probably aren’t reading this since you’re sitting in a dungeon. Even though Wimbledon was broadcast to millions around the world and there were photographers everywhere, Meghan apparently wouldn’t let the peasants use their peasant cameras to take a picture of her royal greatness.
Meghan was at Court 1 with friends to see her other friend Serena Williams play last Thursday. A woman named Sally Jones told the Mail that Meghan is full of herself and obviously lives for the attention, but went on a power trip by putting a stop to Sally’s picture-taking.
Mrs Jones told MailOnline the Duchess was ‘clearly looking around looking to see who was looking at her’, adding: ‘Harry and Meghan see themselves more as A-list celebrities rather than royals carrying out their duties. It’s control-freakery’.
She added: ‘There were around 200 photographers snapping away at her but security were sent to warn an old biddy like me. It makes them look silly. It’s childish and takes us for fools’.
Another spectator took a selfie of himself and Court 1 near her – but Meghan’s bodyguard also warned him about taking pictures in her vicinity.
Surprisingly, “Sally Jones” isn’t an alias used by an intern in The Daily Mail’s anti-Meghan department who is working hard to get a full-time paid job. Sally Jones is a former sports commentator for the BBC and ITV.
Sally claims that she wasn’t taking a picture of Meghan and didn’t even know Meghan was there until one of the royal security guards told her to stop snapping away.
The palace didn’t comment, but a “royal source” said:
‘It’s not uncommon for personal protection officers accompanying any members of the Royal Family to ask people not to take pictures so they can engage with people and events rather than camera phones’.
Of course, Meghan reportedly putting a “privacy please” sign over her face at Wimbledon is another story for the tabloids’ The Duchess Meghan and Prince Hot Ginge Are So Annoyingly Private files.
I don’t get the whole wanting to be private at a public event thing. If I was married to PHG, not only would I gladly let anyone and everyone take my picture, but I’d also hand them a paper with my glam squad and outfit credits on it, and it’d read like this:
Rosy cheeks provided by the dick slapping that PHG gave me about an hour ago, you jealous trollop!
Golden pearl necklace courtesy of PHG’s fully loaded scepter which shot it on me about forty-five minutes ago, you envious skeezer!
Coat by Zara. No, seriously it’s by Zara. Please buy it, because I need it to sell out fast to meet my sell-out-a-coat quota this month. Kate is already ahead of me!