Dior Hates Jennifer Lawrence
The heads of Dior must all feel a fiery hate in their charcoal hearts for Jennifer Lawrence and deep in their offices is a locked room where the walls are covered with pictures of her Xed out face and the floor is covered with their intricate plan to take her down. Their anus lips are probably still chapped from Jennifer Lawrence getting the lead role in that Hunger Games shit over one of their faves. They obviously wanted that Kaya Scodelario chick to play Katniss and now they’re punishing Jennifer Lawrence by hiring her as the face of Dior so they can make her wear jacked-up shit like this. Everything is going according to plan.
At last night’s L.A. premiere of The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (which is what I wish happened to that dress before she put it on), Jennifer Lawrence wore some dress that I’d like to sit under if the mosquitos took over the world and vowed to eat us all alive. Bitch looks like she was getting drunk by the pool and when she tried to run into the house for a white wine spritzer refill, she crashed through the screen door. While she was on the floor, her assistant ran up, told her she was late for the premiere, belted the screen door around her bathing suit and called it a look!
And an impossible thing just happened. Joan Rivers found a way to move her stretched rubber face into a look of glee, because she can’t wait to talk shit about her arch rival’s fug dress thing on Fashion Police.
Here’s more from last night’s premiere including some of Jaden and Willow Smith dressed like a new age lesbian couple from a planet far away and Jena Malone pairing The Slut Dress: Sparkly Holiday Edition with some Sharpie Groucho Marx brows.