File Under “Learn How To Use A Condom”: Beyoncé’s Dad Might Have Fathered Another Secret Baby

July 8, 2014 / Posted by:

And I bet “Beyoncé’s Dad” is exactly how he introduces himself when he slithers up to potential targets at the hotel bar. “Hey there foxy lady, can Beyoncé’s Dad buy you a drink? No? Well what about Beyoncé’s former manager? Can he buy you a drink? C’mom baby, how about the ex-husband of House of Deréon designer Tina Knowles? You want some Deréon sneakers? I think I got some in the car. Only $39.99.”

According to BuzzFeed, Beyoncé’s skeevy father Mathew Knowles might be adding to his collection of whoopsie babies, because a Houston-area woman has come forward claiming she let Beyoncé’s Dad hit it sometime back in 2009 and in 2010 she popped out a destiny’s child. 30-year-old Taqoya Branscomb claims that 63-year-old Mathew is the father of her 4-year-old daughter. I’ll save you from having to dig out your calculator: that means in 2010, Beyoncé’s 59-year-old father was sniffing around for 26-year-old snatch. STAY CLASSY, MATHEW.

Taqoya has come forward because she wants Mathew to take a DNA test and start paying child support (and maybe get her a couple VIP passes for when the “On The Run” Tour rolls through Houston?). Hey Taqoya? First of all, hot name, and second of all, go ahead and let Maury know that he’s not needed, because Beyoncé’s dad is definitely the daddy. Back in 2009, that dumb horny pepaw was fucking anything that moved and he wasn’t wearing a condom. If Taqoya’s baby is his (it is, count on it) it will be the second secret baby he made in 2009. That we know of! There’s probably a lot more, but the baby mamas are scared that if they come forward, Mathew will send his muscle (Basement Baby) to “pay them a little visit”.

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