Kim Kardashian Is Too Sad To "Work"
Kim Kardashian is canceling the rest of her Australian press tour ("YAY!" - Australia) and coming back to the US ("BOO!" - The US), because the black hole in her chest is filling up with sadness and she can no longer go on doing whatever it is she does for money. Yes, it must be hard cracking the strings of Botox in your face by projecting a sad when on the inside you're creaming about how much attention your stupid ass is getting. Bitch, sad harder. Kim looked more genuinely sad about almost losing her $75,000 diamond earring than she does about her marriage ending.
Both UsWeekly and TMZ report that Swisse vitamins marquee paid Kim $150,000 to represent them at the Melbourne Cup Carnival this Saturday, but she let them know that she and Khloe aren't going to be there. Some source says that Kim told them, "I need to take care of me now, and I can't work for awhile."
We have finally found Kim's other talent besides scam artistry. Kim is a master at making laughs! She needs to "take care of me now" and can't "work" for awhile? The day that Kim takes care of anybody other than Kim is the day that I actually make a morning piss without hitting the bathroom tiles (I'm re-enlisting in potty training classes, don't worry). The day that Kim does something that actually counts as real work is the day that I don't watch European gay porn while eating white cheddar Cheez-Its (It's like scratch-and-taste porn).
Oh, Kim, pretending to be sad has turned you into a regular fucking laugh machine. And speaking of laughs, click here to see a scene straight out of Khloezilla Takes Australia . A camera falls on her head!
That look of sheer revenge in Khloe's eyes. Why do I have a feeling that later that night, the pap was overheard screaming in his backyard, "A Khloe ate my baby!"
Here's some pictures of Kim and Khloe promoting their dumb purse line at a mall today. If your child cries while meeting a Kardashian and it isn't because they're afraid one of those skanks' fat asses is going to swallow them whole, CPS should take them away from you.
• 
This is so horrifying. I can't believe how much money these absurd terrors make. WHY WHY WHY
Both UsWeekly and TMZ report that Swisse vitamins marquee paid Kim $150,000 to represent them at the Melbourne Cup Carnival this Saturday, but she let them know that she and Khloe aren't going to be there. Some source says that Kim told them, "I need to take care of me now, and I can't work for awhile."
www.hangryhippo.com: Where hunger, anger, media consumption, and satire meet for a snack
sign the WHORETRASHIANS MUST GO NOW! petition...
http://www.gopetition.com/petitions/no-more-kardashian.html
and thanks for keeping the air cleaner, the water purer, the eyeballs mellower, and the universes blood pressure in check!
Time for these KKKKUUNNNTTTSSSS to go!!
Khloe walks w\ her damn knuckles dragging the floor
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
Ima in vega. I put trash sign. On this kunts new store
Suck on dat
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
The only 'fans' the Lardassians have are crybaby preteens. Everyone else can see Kim's wide matronly ass for what it is - six axe handles across.
The Asstralian's can keep her. The whole family is nothing but trash.
Work? She calls that work? I need that job. Pays great.
Submitted by mike on Thu, 11/03/2011 - 7:56pm.
Hee...hee!
Those people seriously are just walking commercial ads!
===================================================
That crap's peddled at Sears?! That's on par with Walmart, no? One step above a trunk of a car..
----------------------------------------------------
Submitted by boomsy on Thu, 11/03/2011 - 7:19pm.
On a funny note, I went by a Sears here and all that 'Kardashian Kollection' garbage was 40% off...clearly people here have good taste. :)
********************************************
Submitted by Manimal5 on Thu, 11/03/2011 - 5:49pm.
Call me an antisemantic bastard but I don't think she's worked a day in her life.
===================================================
Kim, Khloe, and whatever the other one's called just read that, and in unison exclaimed, "hey, we're half-Armenian, not Jewish!"
Submitted by mike on Thu, 11/03/2011 - 11:54am.
Becky (in Australia) will be bereft.
"""""""""""""""""""""""
Bereft means thrilled, right? :D
HB to Lulu!
Submitted by Manimal5 on Thu, 11/03/2011 - 5:49pm.
Call me an antisemantic bastard but I don't think she's worked a day in her life.
______________________________________________
Au contraire! do you know how much willpower and fortitude it takes to withstand a stream of Ray J's pee? for a WHOLE SEX TAPE? It's basically like the Soviet gulag, except worse.
_______________________________________________
I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.
On a funny note, I went by a Sears here and all that 'Kardashian Kollection' garbage was 40% off...clearly people here have good taste. :)
********************************************
PLEASE SUPPORT A GREAT CAUSE!!!
http://www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/melanieturner/polar-bear-plunge
Yeah right, "too sad" your fat ass. And yet, KH has not been pap'd/photo'd anywhere since this shit went down, but your mountain ass is signing shit and still looking the embalmed fat ass tarantula eyes as ever everywhere. Fuck off.
~~
"Tear up the Introduction! I don't hear enough rips!! This is a battle! Words and ideas CAN change the world. Poetry, Beauty, Romance, Love - these, we stay alive for." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-VUV2Yl8gsI&feature=related -Dead Poets So
*puts on party hat* *throws streamers*
*sprays air freshener to kill lingering stink of stale RayJ piss*
Oh, happy day!
HB to Lulu!
Kunty K komments: Knockers UP!! Knowing what I know KNOW, I would KNEVER EVER married knowingly! It mussa been love, but it's ovah know.
Proof kim whoretrashian and her pimp mommy are lying whores:
"According to US Weekly, a source says that, “Anything earned during the marriage, [Kim] keeps.” And another source told the magazine, “Kris does not receive any of Kim’s money” as part of their divorce settlement. However, the report then says the NBA star would be entitled to “hefty profits from [the couple’s] E! wedding special,” which is bringing he and Kim a major windfall. “Kim and Kris got 30 percent of the revenue from every commercial that aired,” a source told US Weekly. “The wedding special aired in about 50 countries — they made out like bandits!”
So, according to the pimp mommy, "Kim didn't make one penny" from the wedding, eh? Fucking lying whores...
--------------------------------------------
"There's not enough liquor or therapy in the world to help me forget that..." - Archer
Id like to see her resume.
"What bakery is this?"
"Zed's Bread baby, Zed's Bread."
Call me an antisemantic bastard but I don't think she's worked a day in her life.
===================================================
Man, that dress is hideous!
I'm very superficial, I hate everything official.
Correction, remotely resembles work. Oops, too much drinky.
Bitch, you do not do anything that even closely resembles work.
If she is just so sad, maybe she can try suicide? Do it Kim, the time is now!
He just didnt "sparkle" in the limelight. She needs to find a fame-hungry gay. Maybe then her style would improve... it's not like she and chris ever had sex. White peens are like places the pop's are banned from; she wont go near them.
"What bakery is this?"
"Zed's Bread baby, Zed's Bread."
Yeah, I would buy the NBA explanation if he was a starter...but he isn't. I just think she realized she couldn't control him. I caught a few minutes of one of the wedding specials (i know, i know) and he was NOT having it.
**************************************************************
You really have to side clap and pucker for a piece who can stand next to a white feather and out-gay it. - MK 8/3/2011
"What bakery is this?"
"Zed's Bread baby, Zed's Bread."
For people who have so much damned money why do they look so fucking cheap?! Khloe is NOT pulling off that "ombre-haven't-dyed-my-hair-in-months" look. They are the armenian answer to the goddamned Clampett's. Atleast they were funny.
First thing I thought when I heard she was going to Australia right after announcing the divorce was she's gonna go hook up with Shengo, the bodyguard she was boinking before meeting her future husband(HA!). Now the trip is cut short? I'm so hoping I was right, and Shengo told her to take her big 'ol skank butt back home, and buy a great big tub of play-doh that she can mold into her ideal "husband".
The fool must have been summoned home by Pimp Ma to do some extreme damage control. The SS Pissporn has taken a direct hit to the bow and is listing. Bitch is going back to Cali to save the family "brand".
It takes a *lot* to make the Lohans, Stoddens and Hiltons seem decent in comparison, but this travelling gang of attention-whoring grifters have succeeded. Congratulations you pigs!
NBA wife explanation sounds right, but he was a bench warmer soooo...FAIL.
someone posted a few days ago that they think she got second thoughts because she thought she'd be an nba wife and get all the attention there, but with the lockout it didnt quite work out that way. she probably also planned on him being gone for long periods of time. now that he was around 24/7 things were different. well, whoever that person was that posted that, good call and i agree.
whoever is buying this im so sad shit is obviously an idiot.
-----------------------------------------
A baby's first words should not be: "DEATH DON'T TAKE ME NOW!!!" - MK
Submitted by DaddysJoy on Thu, 11/03/2011 - 3:25pm.
Too sad to "work"...bitch all you do is pose for cameras and fly on a plane.
* * *
Yeah, the Kardashians have always had a strange interpretation of that word.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This episode brought to you by the letter SHUTUP.
the oldest one actually has a college degree so i don't mind her as much. but the toilet whore and the big one i can not standddddd.
Thank God she had the strength to Spackle her face.
Wow, I'm kinda stunned that this bitch is feeling a blow back on this, did anyone ever think it was real? Well I hope she goes away no matter how it happens.
I know lots of posters have already said this, but I too hope this is the beginning of the end for the KKKardashian Klan. People are mighty pissed about their complete farce of a marriage--spending millions on a TV spectacle IN THIS ECONOMY (yeah, maybe not the smartest idea, in retrospect). There's a facebook meme at the moment that says "If you think gay marriage cheapens the institution, two words: KIM KARDASHIAN!" with a lovely picture of the happy couple. Maybe this is just what was needed to kick them out of the public eye once and for all.
_______________________________________________
I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.
What the fuck have the Australians ever done to deserve this?
That look of sheer revenge in Khloe's eyes. Why do I have a feeling that later that night, the pap was overheard screaming in his backyard, "A Khloe ate my baby!"
*************************************
This is so funny. I've already come up with about 5 spooky ass visuals to accompany this story;p
♥ Threadkilla!
Lean Like a Chola, Celebrity Stylez: http://youtu.be/0ZwdYeGSVS0
@FilthyBitch: Counseling?! She didn't even really try marriage. That's just really super fucking fancy dating, right there.
♥ Threadkilla!
Lean Like a Chola, Celebrity Stylez: http://youtu.be/0ZwdYeGSVS0
Is Khloe preggers?
nice ripped knee jeans, freak, is it because you are turning into The Hulk???
****************************
"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
"WE ARE THE TRIFECTA OF HATE ENTER THE TRIANGLE." Sucky 6/14/11
Guaranteed 100% she will come back to the US, then make an "announcement" that she is going to "therapy" because half the world yelled "How hard did you even try to save your marriage you didn't even try counseling" - watch and see.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I've got a strong stomach and no standards to speak of" - MK 2/5/11
Did anyone see Pimp Momma Kris on The View pretending to cry?? Bitch, please with a capital P.
Submitted by Echo27 on Thu, 11/03/2011 - 12:56pm.
I really wouldn't be surprised if they reconciled. I could just see a full season of Kim and Kris: The Marriage Crisis on E!. That bald penis-head Dr. Phil will probably be their counselor, using his folksy "wisdom" to help them save their marriage. I can just hear it "Now, Keeem (Kim), It doesn't take a possum drunk on moonshine to see that y'all have some issues." They'll work on their "problems" in full view of the cameras (like the Kardashians do everything else).
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I agree with all this and I am LMAO re Dr Phil's "quote"
****************************
"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
"WE ARE THE TRIFECTA OF HATE ENTER THE TRIANGLE." Sucky 6/14/11
They are both hideous.
Fuck. I mean...just....FUCK!!!!!
_______________________________________________
I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.
It's too bad Mason's not old enuff to say "we did it for the show" and then throw up all over everybody.
References? I got 'em!:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1btM3iLezs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=buKA2bD9mM0
♥ Threadkilla!
Lean Like a Chola, Celebrity Stylez: http://youtu.be/0ZwdYeGSVS0
Too sad to "work"...bitch all you do is pose for cameras and fly on a plane.
When does this piece ever not "take care of me?" Her life is a shrine to herself! Good grief. Just when I think she can't say anything more self-serving, mendacious OR transparent, she does!
As for the veracity of this "marriage," at best it was as stupid and ill-advised as Britney's "marriage" to the other Jason Alexander; at worst it's what it really is: a gigantic, elaborate PR stunt cooked up by her, her family, Ryan Seacrest, E! and People Magazine.
Maybe now she and her idiotic family will go the way of Octomom, Kate Gosselin and her buddy Wonky McValtrex: THE CORNFIELD.
Ignoring Palin worked and it'll work on these kardashian whores! Just try it pleeeeeaaaase!
Look at the two little piggies! Have you returned the ring yet Kim?????????
@Jackie...They are fans of not having a life and watching reprobates with no discernible talent make huge piles of cash pretending to be somebody..
_____________________对您的和平_____________________
F*ck youth, how about a fountain of smart..