Open Post: Hosted By Martha Stewart’s “Not Re-Imaged” Selfies

January 30, 2023 / Posted by:

In this world, nothing is certain except death, taxes, and an 81-year-old Martha Stewart boastfully posting thirst traps. So it’s no surprise that Martha just dropped a fresh double batch of selfies from the salon chair on our asses. In her initial post, her face looked curiously smooth and youthful despite her caption specifying she didn’t use a filter and instead attributing her “skin looking good” to the lighting, a Dry January, and Pilates every other day. But besides a smattering of praise from blue-checked celebrities, the comment section was mostly people telling Martha to get real. So Martha then shared the other selfies she took (which looked much more believable) and doubled down on her amazing skin. She reiterated that it’s all due to a great diet, great exercise, great dermatologists, and NO filters or facelifts. Basically, Martha’s skin is just “a very good thing.”

Martha came in hot with her first “au naturel” selfie, presumably wholeheartedly believing she wasn’t going to catch any smoke despite her visage looking smoother than one of her sneaky Gwyneth Paltrow burns. via People:

Detailing in a first post that she was “lying in the shampoo area of @FredericFekkai,” Stewart said, “The light was perfect for a new selfie!!!” and credited her look for being established with “absolutely no re-imaging!!!”

“By re-imaging I meant no filtering my selfie!” the entrepreneur then clarified in her caption, which added that she was “looking good after a mostly dry January and pilates @bedfordpilates every other day.”

Yet, it was smoke she received for this seemingly obvious blur-tool party:

Not one to back down, Martha came back to post three of her salon selfie outtakes. She says she only chose the first one she posted because she liked her expression the best and still denied filters or surgery. Here’s her second set of selfies, where she didn’t give us the courtesy of “not filtering” her crusty nose hairs (beware of pic 2) like she did in that first “not filtered” selfie:

While Martha only refused a facelift but not a blepharoplasty, neck lift, lip lift, brow lift, Botox, fillers, or a full face transplant, I’ll give it to her that whatever she’s doing has her looking fresh and ready for her next Yung Gravy Bat Mitzvah date!

PicRod Lamkey/CNP/

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