People says that 32-year-old Miles Teller and his 26-year-old longtime girlfriend Keleigh Sperry got married in Maui, Hawaii over the weekend, a little over two years after they got engaged during an African safari. A safari engagement should have led to a Lion King-themed wedding, what with it being the biggest movie this summer. At the very least, his publicist could have suggested some branding synergy with Top Gun-themed wedding vows (“I want you to be the Goose to my Maverick, in theaters June 26, 2020“). But they went with a classic Hawaiian thing.
They also got a shout out from Vogue Weddings.
It’s really too bad Baz Luhrmann has already picked who will play Elvis Presley in his upcoming biopic. Miles was a front runner, and I would have loved to have seen him try to pull some not-subtle campaigning for the role during his wedding. And by that I mean, I would have loved to have seen the not-into-it face Keleigh made while fighting neck cramps under the weight of a 20-pound Priscilla wedding day do.
As for the wedding itself, there aren’t many more pictures and details are slim. People says The Tellers, which should be an NBC sitcom starring the famous magician and his wife but isn’t, spent the weekend with family and friends. They threw a rehearsal dinner and a beach party for everyone. But was there poi and a pig with an apple in its mouth, because TV and movies have taught me that it’s not a Hawaiian party unless there’s poi and a pig with an apple in its mouth. Also missing from the story: how many times a drunk Miles made a joke about getting lei’d on his wedding night.