Duchess Meghan And Prince Hot Ginge Are Apparently Open To Hiring An American Manny (Yes, I’m Writing This While On An Emergency Flight To England)
When I showed this story from The Mirror to the other writers, Mieka’s response was, “Oh shit, no, I have seen The Hand That Rocks The Cradle.” Yes, but in this real-life reboot, the only hard stick the crazed manny is going to get impaled on is going to be the husband’s ginger dick! Yes, I’m already halfway done with writing that fanfic.
Duchess Meghan is due to give birth to Lady Willow Mountbatten-Windsor (they better name their child after one of THE QUEEN’s last corgis) any day now, and so they’re looking for the person who will take care of their little bundle of royal ginger joy as they shake hands and smile during their day job. A source tells The Mirror that the professional TRADITION BREAKERS!!! may continue to break tradition by hiring an American, and possibly an American manny.
The source says that Meghan and PHG have told the nanny recruitment agency they’ve hired that she’d prefer an American nanny and they’re open to a dude. They will both interview the final candidates and the winning Amerinanny or Amerimanny will be paid up to £70,000 a year. Oh, and they want the nanny to be a part of their family. Excuse me while I dust up my resume and put a bunch of fake baby-caring experience on it and use my cousins as fake references.
Meghan may now be a part of a British institution, but she’s a California girl at heart and according to sources “favours an American over a Brit.”
Not only this, but both she and Harry are open to the idea of having a male nanny help with looking after their firstborn.
Yes, Fran Fine from The Nanny is one of the greatest nannies in history, and she’s American, but I would think that the royals would want a stuffy Mary Poppins or Supernanny-type. Maybe Meghan just really wants an American to give baby Lady Willow a touch of California, and by that I mean she wants her kid to say “like” after every other word, drive a mess in the rain, and call every kind of soda “Coke.” Taking care of kids is gross, but I can do that for baby Lady Willow. Just call me Mary Poppins’ gay American cousin: Mary Poppers!