Remember a couple of weeks ago when the iconic childhood home of Marcia Brady was on the market for nearly $1.9 million for the first time in 45 years? The same house where Sam the Butcher passed Alice the meat through the side door, while up in the attic Mrs. Brady was trying to keep her hands off her eldest step-son Greg? A lot of crazy shit went down in The Brady House, and Lance Bass for one wanted to soak up the flavor of the Brady Bunch by putting in a bid well over the asking price.
Imagine Lance’s squeals of delight at finding out that he was the winning bidder and would soon get to move into Marcia’s bedroom and brush his hair 100 times a night in her vanity, only to have that hairbrush yanked out of his hands before he could even call the moving vans. According to Lance’s Instagram page, today he is currently drowning his tears in buckets of whole milk and calling “Shady Brady” after finding out that he was the proud owner of the Brady Bunch house, then had the keys taken away mere moments later.
This story is about as sad as a father-daughter life lesson chat between Mike and Cindy Brady. Lance is known to be a bit of a stunt queen (remember when Cadet Lance wanted to go on a $20 million dollar Mission to Mars?), but he seems genuinely bummed to have missed out on owning the house. But hey, he still got a little press out of it, right?
So what does this mystery “Corporate Buyer” have planned for the house? Brady Bunch theme park? Air BNB? Brady Bunch themed Chicken Ranch? Whatever they do, let’s hope they aren’t saving the house to stage yet another TV show do-over. Then we’ll all be screaming #ShadyBrady.