The first time we saw horny human joint Miley Cyrus and Patrick Schwarzenegger, they were leaving Patrick’s apartment the morning after what many assumed was a night filled with Miley twerking her mudflaps against Patrick’s crotch and asking if he’d want to see her “sex mouse”. And now it looks like they’ve upgraded their relationship from We Might Be Fucking to Oh Yeah, We Fucking. Congrats, you two crazy kids!
Miley and Patrick decided to take their love public last night at a USC Trojans football game by taking selfies of themselves slobbering all over each other, and luckily a pap was there to catch the whole thing. That’s so great, because how many times have you tried to take a picture of you pretending to make out with your current fuck partner and thought “I really wish I had a picture of this from several different angles”? All the time, right? Not to mention that a college football game is the perfect place to announce to the world that you’re officially fucking, since there’s no more hallowed ground for horny crotch-bumping youngins than the jizz-sprayed bleachers of a football field.
And in case you’re wondering why a GED recipient from Billy Bob’s Backwoods Book Learnin’ Academy is wearing head-to-toe USC colors, it’s because Patrick went there. Then again, Miley could just be wearing it because she likes Trojans. “I also like LifeStyles and Durex and the ones which you gets from the gas station vending machines that taste like strawberry! Thems mah favorite!”