Whoopi Goldberg Pulled A Whoopi Goldberg By Defending Stephen A. Smith’s Domestic Abuse Comments On The View

July 30, 2014 / Posted by:

I guess Whoopi Goldberg’s official title at The View is “The Devil’s Chatty Advocate”, because once again, she’s come to the defense of the not-right words falling out of some jerk’s talk-hole. Whoopi has defended Mel Gilbson’s infamous racist rant, defended Roman Polanski by inventing the word “rape-rape”, and most recently, defended human hershey squirt Justin Bieber’s use of the n-word. And now we can add Stephen A. Smith’s name to the list of people sending Whoopi an Edible Arrangement with a little note that says “xo thanks boo!”

On Monday’s episode of The View, the hens started clucking about the questionable remarks ESPN’s Stephen A. Smith made about domestic violence in response to the story of Baltimore Ravens running back Ray Rice beating his wife in a casino and dragging her unconscious body out of an elevator. Smith has since been suspended for saying that it’s never OK for a man to pull a Chris Brown on his wife, but that sometimes a lady needs to “make sure” she doesn’t “do anything to provoke wrong actions”. On Monday, Smith apologized for his comments, but Whoopi wasn’t having any of that “I sowwy” shit. Whoopi grabbed for the bottle of Shits About To Get REAL-brand vodka she keeps stashed under her chair, took two giant swigs, and defended Stephen A. Smith for speaking the TRUTH:

“If you hit somebody, you cannot be sure you are not going to get hit back!…If you make the choice as a woman who’s four foot three and you decide to hit a guy who’s six feet tall and you’re the last thing he wants to deal with that day and he hits you back, you cannot be surprised!”

I think Whoopi needs to walk her ass to the optometrist and get the prescription on her glasses checked, because if a mouth breather like Sherri Shepherd is staring at you like you’ve got dried smegma flakes for brains and noted dum-dum Jenny McCarthy is sending you “Oh here go hell come” vibes, it might be time to stop talking. And if she did see the army of shank-eyes staring back at her and choose to keep running her mouth, well then Whoopi truly does not give a fuck anymore, and I look forward to the day she shows up to tape The View wearing her neon green and purple Oscar gown while eating slices of apple off the blade of a knife like a pirate.

(via The Wrap)

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