Mars’ New Candy Bar Is A Real Slut

May 21, 2009 / Posted by: Michael K

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Mars has introduced their first candy bar in 20 years and they call this one “The Fling.” It’s the size of a finger and comes wrapped in some pink crap with the words “pleasure yourself” on it. You know where my mind is going, so I won’t be offended if you exit stage left……

In the commercial above, it looks like some dude and some chick are doing sexy stuff in a dressing room. You know, fingering each other’s asses, slapping each other’s taints…the norm. Then the camera pans up and we see that they are actually in two different dressing rooms. The girl sits down, takes out her “Fling” and bites into it.

“The Fling” looks like a butt banging gone wrong! The last time some dude waved a chocolate finger at my face, I called 911, because I might be a big whore, but I don’t play that shit (literally)! I don’t care if it’s only 85 calories per finger. No way, no how.

VIA Videogum

Tags: Deliciousness, Gross, Hot Slut of the Day, I Don't Like Jokes, The Colbert

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