On the sequins-covered 35 car pile-up that is Dancing with the Has-Beens last night, contestants did a dance inspired by a memorable year in their life. Obviously we know that the MOST memorable time in Elizabeth Berkley’s life was the time she made cinema’s answer to the Bible, SHOWGIRLS, but she’s still in denial and hopefully a therapist will help her see the light soon. So she said that next to having her son, doing Saved By The Bell was the most memorable time in her life, so she paid tribute to that time by recreating the legendary caffeine pill meltdown.
YAASS! You know, Jessie Spano and the humanized Ukrainian Chick-O-Stick Val Chmerkovskiy really brought something new to “I’m So Excited” and made me realize what the original scene was missing. The “I’m So Excited” scene from Saved By The Bell would’ve won several honorary Emmys if Zack Morris did the entire scene without a shirt on…like Val did!
Since Elizabeth Berkley is paying tribute to important moments in her career. I fully expect her to recreate the flopping dolphin scene from Showgirls. I will never be able to look her in the face again if she doesn’t.
And here’s my second favorite dance of the night. Leah Remini said that this past year has been the most memorable year in her life, because she’s made a big change by deciding that she’s not going to be told what to do anymore. (Translation: Bitch quit Scientology.) Leah played a puppet who breaks free from her puppeteer.
What a mess. I love it. But I would’ve loved it more if Tony Dovolani wore an alien mask. And John Travolta doesn’t know whether to hiss at this or kiss it all over. On one hand, Leah is calling out Scientology. On the other hand, John Travolta can’t say no to an on-stage costume change and jazz hands. So conflicted!