But More Importantly, What In The Hell Kind Of GD Set Decoration Is This?
As Gayle King gave Oprah a victory massage in her spot of choice (it's way too late in the week for me to describe in detail what Oprah's spot of choice is, so you decide), millions of people watched Lance Armstrong admit to being a doper and an award-winning champion liar. But as Lance barfed out the truth, I kept focusing on the shit job the set decorator did. Yes, I care about the important things. Oprah really screwed up this time, because there goes that Emmy nomination for Best Set Decoration in a Shit Show.
While watching, I kept waiting for two old ladies wearing windbreakers to walk on by, pick up a vase, look under it for the price and then scream at Oprah, "$5?! You crazy! I'll take it off your hands for two quarters and nothing more." Shit looked like an estate sale. What was with that shallow bowl thing? When are people going to learn that you can't just put an empty bowl on a table and call it design. Oprah could've thrown some tangerines in there or if she really wanted to be a bitch, she should've filled it with Truck Nutz. Maybe The Mighty O had that bowl on hand, because she was going to use it to collect Lance's nut if he refused to come clean. And that mysterious box on the table? Gayle King should've come out in a rhinestone gown ala Price is Right and opened it to reveal Lance's favorite shootin' up needle. But she didn't. That box and that bowl were about as useless as those bendy straws. I swear, Oprah should've hired Sandra Lee to do the background tablescape. Anyway, enough about that. Now let's move on to less important matters.
Lance finally admitted that starting in the 90s, he took performance-enhancing drugs including blood doping, EPO, testosterone and HGH. Lance admitted that he took them before all of seven of his Tour de France victories, but that he stopped doping in 2005. Lance also admitted to being a first-rate shit bag to anybody who outed him as a doping cheat. Lance was never afraid he'd get caught and he never thought he was going to get caught. Lance doped up, because a lot of the other cyclists were doping up and he wanted to level the playing field. Lance called himself an "arrogant prick" and said that he just got caught up in the lie and so he kept on lie-telling:
"I view this situation as one big lie that I repeated a lot of times. I know the truth. The truth isn't what was out there. The truth isn't what I said. I'm a flawed character, as I well know. All the fault and all the blame here falls on me."
The weirdest part of the interview was when Lance told Oprah that he had called Betsy Andreu, an accuser who refused to lie for him, and said this to her:
"I called you crazy. I called you a bitch. But I never called you fat."
Betsy responded by saying, "Phew! I'm so glad you don't think I'm fat, Lance. I'd rather be a crazy skinny bitch than a sane fat nicey person." It's nice to know that the potent drug known as CRAZY is still flowing through Lance's veins.
And I'd like to take this time to confess to all of you that for years I've been using performance-enhancing drugs for bloggers like boxed wine, pocket pies and weed. Wait, or maybe those are performance-degrading drugs. I could've read the labels wrong.
via HuffPo
• 
I dngaf about anything Armstrong has to say at this point.
@Kisa, "LIESTRONG" - Bwahahahahaha ;D
"And I'd like to take this time to confess to all of you that for years I've been using performance-enhancing drugs for bloggers like boxed wine, pocket pies and weed. -- MK, you are supposed to wait until the statute of limitation expires(?) to confess that shit. smdh ;)
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Jelly & wham - it's a good thing I've got 2 hands then. I thank you both.
"DuFrane party of two. DuFrane party of two. Bush party of three.
Yeah but , what happened to the DuFranes ?!?!?!?!?!?!? "
- Mitch Hedberg 1968 - 2005.
Psychopath,no remorse,inhuman.It's a process, my ass! He hasn't changed. I hope he loses everything, but he probablly won't, people like him seem to get rewarded.Oprah is a fake bitch.
Submitted by Kukai-manini on Sat, 01/19/2013 - 4:17am.
Glammy
Seams?
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Not exactly sure what you are asking gladyslove trollbot #117?
Seams?
Glammy
Seams?
Why are people hating on Oprah for this interview?
I'm not a fan of Oprah but what exactly did she do wrong by getting an exclusive ratings grab interview for her struggling cable network?
It's not like she offered a million dollars to interview Casey Anthony like Jerry Springer did!
It seams to me people are pissed that she is a damn billionaire and instead of retiring she tried building a cable network empire.
I never followed cycling or LA closely, but when he started super-humanly dominating the sport, I started to wonder...then when he won again after ball cancer, I had no doubt that he was doping.
When ppl do the impossible time after time, it's most likely a lie.
Superman is fiction. Man is bound by the laws of nature.
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Thunder only happens when it's rainin
Players only love you when they're playin
Submitted by chinchilla on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 9:09pm.
No way! Too funny...
Psychotic asshole. I hope all the people he destroyed financially over the years can get their's back now. Or is there a statute of limitations on what he did to them as well?
Submitted by jelliebean on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 8:20pm.
Submitted by Kisa on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 6:17pm.
The real BOIL Promo wristbands should have read LIESTRONG and he did!
^^
LMAO! This rant is a thing of beauty, I kiss your hand.
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Yes Kisa I'm with Jellybelly, well ranted! :D
LIESTRONG...Bwaaahaaaahhaaa! Fuckin classic!
I watched some of the interview and Lance has da crazy eyes that don't blink.
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@RandeSleepover
it's one of his nicks, spanglish for "one ball". he owns an Austin coffee shop w/the name.
Submitted by chinchilla on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 8:53pm.
if i see Juan Pelota i'm putting a stick thru his spokes.
LMAO! Never heard that before...
bad enough he cheated and lied shamelessly for years
but he went on a mission to annihilate anyone who dared speak the truth about him. he doesn't even remember who he sued or how many, nvmd those he bullied and whose reps he ruined in the court of public and professional opinion. if i see Juan Pelota i'm putting a stick thru his spokes.
This sociopath is something else. He sued people who he knew was telling the truth just because he could. Don't even get me started on his charity. BULLYING ASSHOLE!
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by johnnysgirl on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 4:31pm.
Another one for the pit! *forages for kindling*
LOL! Jay Mohr was ranting today about how his old cheap-rubber yellow Livestrong bracelet read "Made in China" on the back. Like saving a few pennies by overseas sourcing would generate more money for cancer.
Submitted by Kisa on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 6:17pm.
The real BOIL Promo wristbands should have read LIESTRONG and he did!
^^
LMAO! This rant is a thing of beauty, I kiss your hand.
Oprah is a narc. She's beyond just an ego. She cares only about herself & she's not a nice person it's all a facade with her. Her thinly veiled veneer of status is just that. Everybody knows that this empress has no clothes EVERYBODY KNOWS perhaps 1 day soon Ms. 0 will grab a clue or 2 ? ?
Now as for this other pos Lance or my new name for him " Boil " he deserves to be exposed. What a pathological liar , meglomananiacal cluster B personality disorder group fucker he is, was, and will always be. Showed not an iota of remorse at all ?!
I hated his stupid yellow rubber bracelets he had promoting his bs ! They hadthe word " LIVESTRONG " on them however better late than never to find out they were embossed with a major error , the letter " v " should not have been on them. The real BOIL Promo wristbands should have read LIESTRONG and he did ! What a pos he was and still is. Sheryl Crow had a lucky escape she's a beautiful genuine person with real talent and a kindred spirit also her eloquent silence on this matter is quite commendable enough that I see fit to mention it here today. I love her :)
PecuLIAR that this turd Mr. BOIL refers to him self as an " arrogant prick " who cannot even be true to himself ? You know I firmly beLIEve that when one tells you who he is believe him. Just saying it out loud is a tell of the sociopaths pathology.
He deserves to stripped of his medals & I concur. May he fail miserably and remain unhappy always. Goodbye for keeps & for ever to a fucking pos !!!
"DuFrane party of two. DuFrane party of two. Bush party of three.
Yeah but , what happened to the DuFranes ?!?!?!?!?!?!? "
- Mitch Hedberg 1968 - 2005.
Bambam:
The losses she incurs from OWN are deductible which offsets the taxable income she derives from her $3 billion net worth.
If anything, this is good for her bottom line as she pays virtually no income tax.
Lance Armstrong is the #1 cunt of the past two millenia. Worse than Judas. Most evil person currently on the planet.
A woman who has a network named after her obviously has a massive ego, which is not unusual amongst people who've built immense wealth. But that network is bleeding money and an interview with Lance Armstrong is a major get. Bottom line, it's about business.
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fuck u dan snyder.
it's beyond me how hard I see some people work everyday and someone makes this kind of money for riding a bike.
I don't care how fast it is blah blah, it's riding a BIKE for gods sakes.
we have shit backwards.
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
In general, society tends to make sports figures/athletes their heroes when in fact, most of them are the most flawed individuals on the planet.
I have to laugh a wee bit at all those people who bought into the Armstrong mystique. Those people who wore the yellow Livestrong bands and wore them proudly on their wrist.
Yes, he was raising awareness for cancer but in the end he probably profited more than the charities have just as Oprah has profited by any cause she has been a part of. My bullshit radar for Lance has always been set on high and I never found him appealing or heroic. Just another douchebag jock who has tried to fool the masses.
However, it seems bad behaviour is rewarded nowadays so he'll probably be getting his own reality tv show very soon.
Oprah doesn't do this for the money. Oprah does this to fuel the flames of her massive ego.
I first met Lance in 1991 when he was 19-year-old wunderkind, and he was a loathsome asshole from the very beginning.
Submitted by Craigypants on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 4:05pm.
Why the fuck is Opprah doing this interview? I thought she retired from her show years ago with that ridiculous 4 day send off which was the biggest golden straw fest of sucking up I have ever seen, for some reason she thinks she is the second coming of Christ. As for Lance, there was nothing new in this interview, still arrogant, still self entitled and everything the press was saying for 15 years was true. He should go to jail just like Marion Jones who was doped up to her eyeballs.
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Oprah is doing the interview because she's got the star-power to actually make it happen and the means to pay his sorry ass to do it....not to mention she'll make a fortune off of it.
She's doing it because she likes money and has the ability to make shitloads of it when the mood strikes her.
Submitted by sushi on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 4:26pm.
I hate him but I did laugh at "but I didn't call you fat." Thought that was a funny joke.
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IMO this asshole doesn't deserve to have a sense of humor in this interview. He makes a fat joke about someone he basically torrmented while he should be confessing/apologizing and he smirks after he said it? he's sick.
I feel extra bad for the countless people he sued who were telling the truth. Who knows how many nights of sleep they lost because they were petrified of what a juggernaut of intimidation his legal team probably was....and all he could say when she asked him how many people he had sued was "I can't remember."
FUCK YOU.
Another one for the pit! *forages for kindling*
I hate him but I did laugh at "but I didn't call you fat." Thought that was a funny joke.
Didnt care to watch this. MK, wheres the #getmoneybitch tag?
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"Not a second goes by when one isn't cock-a-doodle-doodling up my asshole. That sounded sexy, but it isn't." - Michael K.
One of the lowest forms of life on the planet. He actually sued and won when he was cheating the whole entire time. No to mention all the people he threatened. Total asshole.
He's a joke. You could tell so much of it was rehearsed and when Oprah got off track onto something he obviously hadn't thought of he started to falter. This interview came off as pompous and self-serving and completely insincere. At one point he even cracked a fat joke at Betsy Andreu while still trying to apologize????? Then he smirks? Nice.
It was almost as if it was a sociopath trying his best to pretend he was normal. Creeped me out.
On the other hand - he has helped raise millions upon millions of dollars for cancer research and at the end of the day that's great. He can be a jerk but at least some people gained from it.
Submitted by jerseygirl17 on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 2:43pm.
please do not EVER again ask me to look in the direction of Bonds or Clemons. ever. blech. yech. ;-)
i also agree with you.
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
wonder how much $$ oprah paid this jagoff?
her stoopid network is DOA & she thinks this lying POS is gonna save it?
ha ha. sucker!
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♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
Asshole scum.
Why the fuck is Opprah doing this interview? I thought she retired from her show years ago with that ridiculous 4 day send off which was the biggest golden straw fest of sucking up I have ever seen, for some reason she thinks she is the second coming of Christ. As for Lance, there was nothing new in this interview, still arrogant, still self entitled and everything the press was saying for 15 years was true. He should go to jail just like Marion Jones who was doped up to her eyeballs.
O is probably cheap as hell. Most wealthy people are, in my experience. My high school boyfriend's dad was rich & if we went to dinner w/him, he wouldn't let anyone order a drink. You had to drink water...he would make this ghetto lemonade out of water, a lemon slice, and packets of artificial sweetener rather than pay for iced tea or soda.
Submitted by jerseygirl17 on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 2:43pm.
He's doing it now because athletes who are defiant and keep denying the obvious have a rougher time. Look at Barry Bonds and Roger Clemens
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I wasn't really listening when I heard it but this will benefit him somehow in a future lawsuit against him.
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fuck u dan snyder.
Lance Armstrong is a sociopath. There are plenty of articles on how he threatened people with violence to keep them quiet. He isn't apologetic. He's a pathological liar and has absolutely no remorse about getting caught.
MK the interview was conducted at the Four Season's Hotel in Austin... and for as expensive as that hotel is, most of their decor is like that in most of their properties.
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 1:14pm.
refuse to watch either of those jackasses. honey boo boo? i'd look at her all day long. these two? fuck them both.
another theory re why he's doing this now -- to boost his personal appearance fees, get paid for interviews, write a book about his "confession" and doping, etc etc. $$$
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He's doing it now because athletes who are defiant and keep denying the obvious have a rougher time. Look at Barry Bonds and Roger Clemens.
Both Lance and Oprah are false in their own way.
'We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.'
Submitted by Whamo on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 12:58pm.
Submitted by IrishFury on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 12:46pm.
^^
Take a hint I.F., Whamo likes to watch. I hear Fantasy World in the west village has some nice toys for this.
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I know a competitive cyclist, he maintained for years that Lance doped, used blood boosters, stored oxygenated blood etc, he said Lance himself always answered "I am tested constantly and I've never had a positive result." He was sort of admitting it even then, but arrogant about cheating better than the others, not getting caught.
As for the cyclist I know, fat is a dirty word, the worst thing he could call you. They live for staying underweight to ride faster. This guy is a complete anorexic, he takes his shirt off after a race and you can see all the bones in his upper torso. He's proud of it. When his daughter was four (she is tiny and bony) he would pick her up and pinch her thighs and tell her she was getting "fat."
Submitted by bridgjones on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 1:48pm.
I did not know that about Betsey. Good for her. No matter how hard he tries to stop it, karma is on Lance's tail and closing fast.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
bjork!howthehellareya! *packs bowl*
i noticed something askew w/sfrb's post on the ai thread, whammo referenced it but it was gone. cue the twighlight zone theme ...
*peddles off in a mint '88 yugo*
I haven't watched the interview as I have it TiVoed for tonight but whoever this Betsy Andreu person is should be given a crown and jewels. These are the type of people we should be talking about, not people like Lance Armstrong. People who do the RIGHT thing. When I think about this Lance story I keep picturing Samurai warriors who do wrong and commit hara-kiri. Time to hara-kiri Lance. Shame, shame, shame.
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www.dungeonhordes.com
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"I called you crazy. I called you a bitch. But I never called you fat."
My fucking eulogy!
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What the fuck dude? And being European is NOT an excuse. - IHateCharityChic 05/10/2012
Submitted by Deb on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 1:35pm.
^^
Cosign. I didn't watch because I didn't want to give the Big O ratings. I knew everyone would be blabbing about it in the morning.
I admit it, I was a huge Lance fan. I watched the Tour on TV as a teen. As I got older, I saw the prick attitude and the dumping of SC. I was turned off by the man, but inspired still by his comeback.
I'm not surprised, I was disappointed when it all first came out years ago. I downloaded the PDF from the doping committee.
He hates Betsey, because SHE was the one that started all of this. He wanted her husband on the team and wanted him to dope. BA said "FUCK THAT you aren't putting that shit in your body and if LA doesn't back the fuck off, I'm telling." And she did. She was besties with his first wife.
I want to know what Sheryl has to say... not these two fucks!