Teeth Of Meth No More

October 30, 2011 / Posted by:

Waking up to the crack house rats nibbling the pieces of shit and meth jank from her rotting butt corn teeth must have been the sign Lindsay Lohan needed to get her ass to a dentist, because she finally did and showed off her new Chiclets on her Twatter page last night with this little note:

Thanks Dr. Dorfman for the zoom… My gums are so sore though!

ZOOM?! Bitch, now you know you used that Playboy money from smiling your snatch on full-on veneers, not Zoom. If those aren’t shiny white graveteeth covers, then that cup on her nightstand is soda instead of piss from a sober baby for future drug testing. I mean, if ZOOM could work that kind of miracle, then I’d use it on my bruised and battered no-no to restore it to its natural glory.

It says a lot when LiLo immediately runs out and gets her teeth situation fixed after we all said that mess looked like baked pumpkin seeds out of a dog’s ass. But yet she doesn’t do anything when the public yells at her to fix her life and shit decision making skills. I mean, this is the shit she chooses to fix? Priorities!

On a positive note, at least she has a new dazzling smile for her new mug shot of glamour.

And here’s LiLo at the morgue on Friday, breaking in her new veneers with a cig.

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