Kristen Stewart As Snow White
Straight from Comic-Com comes the promo pictures for Stoned Snow White and the Huntsman starring Kristen Stewart as Snow White, Charlize Theron as The Evil Queen, Chris Hemsworth as The Huntsman, Sam Claflin, Eddie Izzard, Nick Frost and Toby Jones. This is the second Snow White movie coming out next year, and this one is going to turn Snow White into a Joan of Arc type bad bitch who drops the innocent maiden act to take down The Queen.
I know these are just pictures, but since only premature overreactions are allowed on the internet, I just have to say: THE FUCK?! Kristen Stewart as Snow White = No. Kristen Stewart as Dopey = Si. How is Snow White going to bite the apple when she's too busy biting her own lip? How are we going to know the difference between Snow White in an apple-induced coma and Snow White not in an apple-induced coma since Kristen Stewart always looks like she's been bitten by the Lunesta moth. And even a half-broken lezzie mirror with Twihard tendencies who has never felt the drop of Windex would never say that Kristen Stewart is "fairer" than Charlize Theron. Bye Ho....Bye Ho....
Bitches need to explain all of this right after they explain why Charlize Theron looks like Heidi of the Alps at a Brother of the Wolf costume party.
via ONTD
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WHERE ARE THE PICTURES OF EDDIE IZZARD?
Submitted by Bapril on Mon, 07/25/2011 - 8:23am.
As for noted thespian Kristin Stewart, a best good friend of mine always says, "Miss Stewart ran the gamut of emotions from A to B."
I think that was Dorothy Parker on Kate Hepburn.
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Have you ever posed with the Cutlets in the pap's flash light?
F- the prince. The Huntsman is HOT!!!!
Charlize is the hottest white woman on earth.
The Evil Queen is a personal hero of mine so I can't co-sign any of this crap. As for noted thespian Kristin Stewart, a best good friend of mine always says, "Miss Stewart ran the gamut of emotions from A to B."
I thought Snow White was supposed to be more beautiful than the evil queen? No need to worry about who the fairest of them all is with Charlize cast in this role. Kinda makes the whole movie a moot point. Kristen Stewart is about as plain as they come.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
c'on loopygorilla dont be such a scatty bitch. we all know kirstin got this part because of the sucess of twilight. that being said after seeing this i am kinda wishing they went with someone else as she still looks like a pouty teenager.
also-doesnt charlize theron always look like that-very pretty but not very fierce looking-
jolie would've been a better choice.
Straight to DVD for this mess.
Whose dick is Kristen sucking and fucking to get these roles???
She must be a kinky ass bitch who is down with doing anything.
I can't see any other reason for her to get roles since she has zero acting ability.
Submitted by dementa on Sun, 07/24/2011 - 7:30pm.
"Are they even gonna have dwarves in this?!"
By the looks of it Snow White killed them all off.
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Who are you calling silly cow?
Fuck Kristen!
Charlize Theron looks coiffed to kill!
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How can this broad look petulant in full body armor????
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Therefore be silent, and keep your forked tongue behind your teeth. I have not passed through fire and death to bandy crooked words with a serving-man till the lightning falls. - Gandalf the motherfucking White
"How is Snow White going to bite the apple when she's too busy biting her own lip?"
OMG MK...LOL
Kristen Stewart isn't unattractive, but she's not what I would say the fairest of them all. If Charlize Theron is the queen, you would think they would've raised the standards a little bit. I'm not trying to sound superficial, I'm just going with the story here (or at least the basic and probably inaccurate Disney version), and where did the armor come from, did Disney fail to include that too?
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What would Jesus do for a Klondike Bar?
Fuck the internetz, we can cry into our piles of money.
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"Never ascribe to malice that which can adequately be explained by incompetence."
- Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)
@vidz- LOL! Actually I'd do the same. I'd just make sure to stay off the internetz so I wouldn't have to read a bunch of comments from cranky bitches in their mom jeans saying I look like sasquatch's homelier pre-op tranny sister or some shit ;)
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"I'd rather regret the things I've done than regret the things I haven't done." -Lucille Ball-sy
@ louise b. Thanks...wrote that one down too. I think I'm having an eddie fest this week since it's too hot to even go outside. Perfect antidote to summer cabin fever...
Thanks crazyinjapan vidz and callie...I gots new shady free bookmarks now! shit is expensive now I'll take inside tips on free streaming. And 'the riches'..I am not a big minnie d fan but eddie cancels anyone out.yessss!!!
charlize theron is one hot bitch, I grant you. But she got some major extreme makeover shit done to her face. If you google "charlize theron my brother is not a killer"--an article pops up and has pictures of charlize pre-fame-and taht bitch was looking like Taylor Swifts homely twin!
Submitted by Chucks on Sun, 07/24/2011 - 8:42pm.
What the fucking hell.
lol! Well put.
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THE FULL RELEASE LOOP
What the underlying loop inside all of this really is
1974 someone used satellite time and brain cephalics (same thing), to view me, in 19764
The sound of the BR
What the fucking hell.
@tonic
I love to play casting agent! Seriously I don't what's going on in their minds. TBH I don't have any hate for Kstew because it's the director's choice to cast her and out of 1000s of other prettier, more talented actresses. Heck if someone offered me the lead in Helen of Troy, I'd smash all the mirrors in my house, say yes and and wipe any insecurities away with my piles of money.
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"Never ascribe to malice that which can adequately be explained by incompetence."
- Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)
Submitted by The Real Mean Girl on Sun, 07/24/2011 - 8:22pm.
Had they cast someone else as Snow White I think this movie would've had a chance.
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With KStew in the title role it will probably be an accidental comedy.
I smell a bounty of Razzie nominations.
Submitted by vidz on Sun, 07/24/2011 - 7:07pm.
@tonic
I think Kstew is pretty too. And I LOVE Christina Ricci, I just thought she would be too old. Winona would have made a great queen though.
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I forgot about Wynona, she would make a perfect crazy bitch queen. I think Christina still looks young and can actually act, plus she's got that whole gothic thing so she could pull off whatever it is they're going for here. Hollywood casting just blows (helloooo Jennifer Lawrence and Hunger Games). It's still bound to suck less than anything fucking Julia Roberts is in, so at least it's got that going for it.
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"I'd rather regret the things I've done than regret the things I haven't done." -Lucille Ball-sy
Submitted by becky n sydney
Will Vern Troyer be doing burnouts in his motorized wheelchair and pissing naked in the corner of the set?
LMFAO This made me snort! Had they cast someone else as Snow White I think this movie would've had a chance. Everyone is so burned out on Twilight and her fuck awful acting/teeth that no one will go to see this.
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"Drink your juice, Shelby" M'Lynn Steel Magnolias
I bet Eddie is either the mirror or a dwarf. Most likely mirror.
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"Never ascribe to malice that which can adequately be explained by incompetence."
- Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)
Charlize is the hotness
Are they even gonna have dwarves in this?!
Also, to make the casting of KStew even sillier, imagine THAT creature trying to handle a sword and kick anyone's ass. That will be prime comedy.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
But who will be playing the dwarves?
Will Vern Troyer be doing burnouts in his motorized wheelchair and pissing naked in the corner of the set?
KSpew sucks.That is all.
Just as a reminder for folks, the Brother Grimm wrote haughting and rather violent fairy tales.
Snow White from Disney is different from Snow White and Red Rose.
Either way, this movie will still flop.
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All together now: FUCK MY LIFE. - The One-and-Only Michael K- 6/17/11
Isn't Snow white supposed to be prettier than the queen? And when did she start wearing armor?? Am I getting old? did they change the story and I don't know about it? wth?
personally, if it isn't a Tim Burton remake, I'm not interested. he seems to be the only one who can make the stories come to life the way I see them in my head....only crazy better.
Gaaaa, Kristen Stewart? Fuck no!
Putas and all the Dlisted peeps go to Peteava.ro to watch alot of shows in HD. It streams immediately, just ignore the romanian subbies.
You can thank me later.
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"Never ascribe to malice that which can adequately be explained by incompetence."
- Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)
haven't seen a movie in the theaters in over 5 years. i don't believe this flick is going to change the streak either.
there just seems to be a never ending stream of movies not even remotely worth paying 10 bucks to see.
@tonic
I think Kstew is pretty too. And I LOVE Christina Ricci, I just thought she would be too old. Winona would have made a great queen though.
Charlize was awesome in Arrested Devt as a retard. And yes I was gutted when United States of Tara was cancelled.It was getting so interesting with that brother alter. I'm still hoping another network picks it up. Still nothing compared to when they cancelled pushing daisies.
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"Never ascribe to malice that which can adequately be explained by incompetence."
- Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)
Submitted by putas on Sun, 07/24/2011 - 3:29pm.
**downloads united states of tara*** :)
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Thaaaankyewww! I loved that show so much and I'm depressed it's gone. Want to see it free? Go to ch131.com (if it's still there) and stream.
And Callie, I loved The Riches, too. They always cancel the best shows and keep shit like 2 1/2 Men.
I'm probably one of the few that thinks KStew is (sometimes) very pretty but that girl cannot act for shit. Agree with whoever said Kat Dennings. Actually even Christina Ricci would have been much better.
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"I'd rather regret the things I've done than regret the things I haven't done." -Lucille Ball-sy
Submitted by Callie on Sun, 07/24/2011 - 5:47pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Sun, 07/24/2011 - 1:36pm.
Kristen Stewart as Snow White = No. Kristen Stewart as Dopey = Si.
Lindsay Lohan called...she's appalled that she wasn't considered for this role either.
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It's not called Orange Mess, Lindsay.
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LOL @ everyone. However, she's more qualified to play Giotti's wife or even Black Swan than she is Snow White. Snow White didn't suck dick or shoplift, did she?
@Putas - Watch "The Riches" to see a great Eddie Izzard role. He plays a grifter, with Minnie Driver as his wife, who takes over a rich family's life after they die. It had two seasons but ends abruptly. (Boo.)
Submitted by angel_i on Sun, 07/24/2011 - 1:36pm.
Kristen Stewart as Snow White = No. Kristen Stewart as Dopey = Si.
Lindsay Lohan called...she's appalled that she wasn't considered for this role either.
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It's not called Orange Mess, Lindsay.
They all look so...serious. Moody. Snow White with sword and shield - WTF? Charlize still looks gorgeous, tho'.
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"It's all fun and farts until somebody gets punched." -MK
Red Rose was a separate dealio.
Dwarves or dwarfs, like hooves or hoofs. I think it depends which pronunciation you like.
Sadly, perhaps, SW was saving herself for the prince. Besides, why let yourself be tickled by seven gerkins when there are huntsmen with big axes and princes with magic swords?
Snow White was a Brother's Grimm story first, wasn't it? Snow White and Red Rose? If they want to rework it, fine with me and I don't have enormous issues with KStew. She was good as Joan Jett.
Don't hit me too hard, but I like the promo pics.
Wow who'd a thought that a chick living with seven guys (who are dwarfs no less, or is that dwarves?) could be boring, but, there it is.
Only Kristen Stewart could make people yawn at the thought of a septuple penetration.
I don't think Eddie Izzard is credited, but it's only in pre-production, so anything's possible. It's the director's first film. The pundits are saying the producers put on a dog and pony show at Comic-Con to get the jump in the public's mind on the competing Snow White project.
Isn't the point of Snow White that she's snowy, white, and passive? If she kicks ass like The Bride in Kill Bill, it's not Snow White anymore.
They copied that armor shtick from the latest Alice in Wonderland.
And the gorgeous, supple Charlize Thieron playing the over-the-hill queen? Puh-lease. You know who would be perfect for this role? Tommy Girl. Seriously. Since they're being all post-modern and shit.
The Queen's frizzy hair bothers me.
Awful idea for a movie, but I must admit that Kristen looks really good in armor.
Poor Charlize. She is now playing roles meant for older women. Next she will probably do a remake of On Golden Pond.
You know you're an adult when the Huntsman does more for you than the Prince. lol
I'm an adult.
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