Can You Feel The Passion?

September 18, 2008 / Posted by:

You are witnessing Tommy Girl and his Stepford wife awkwardly holding each other the first time in days. They save these precious moments for when dozens of paparazzi are around. This is about as passionate as a boiled turnip laying in a pile of crusty oatmeal. I’ve hugged my always constipated accountant with more affection. Seriously, he’s always constipated and lets me know about it. Imagine hugging someone you know is having trouble taking a dump. Exactly. It’s still sexier than Tommy Girl uncomfortably embracing Stepford Katie.

You can tell that Tommy Girl is totally “ewwwwwing‘ inside at the thought of getting that close to a vagina owner. He’s trying to picture E.T.’s head on David Beckham’s oiled-up body. Obviously, it didn’t work.

Here’s more of these two alien dykes failing at fooling all of us while leaving Katie’s dress rehearsal for “All My Sons.” And you know John Travolta is getting off on Tommy Girl’s barley sweat stained pits. He likes to lick……I’ll stop.

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