Amber Heard Has Dropped Her Lawsuit Against Doug Stanhope

During Amber Heard and Johnny Depp’s chunky diarrhea puddle of a messy divorce fight, Johnny’s friend, comedian Doug Stanhope, made it perfectly clear that he’s sitting on the side marked “Team Queso Dick and Butt Breath” when he wrote an essay where he labeled Amber as a lie-telling and manipulative gold digging hussy harlot tramp whore. Doug claimed that Amber invented fake domestic abuse allegations against Johnny and used them to blackmail him for a big divorce settlement. Amber responded to Doug’s essay by suing him for defamation. Since Amber and Johnny’s divorce war is finally over (or is it?), she has decided to toss her lawsuit against Doug into a dumpster fire, along with all of the clothes that got ruined from Johnny getting his French onion soup-smelling armpit syrup on them.

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Johnny Depp Thanked Doug Stanhope For His “Honesty”

Comedian Doug Stanhope was one of the first of Johnny Depp’s friends to defend him and bitch went hard. In a piece that was posted on The Wrap, Doug painted Johnny as a po’ lil’ defenseless smegma ball of a victim whose succubus wife vowed to ruin him the same way he ruined his pretty if he didn’t give her everything she wanted in their divorce settlement. Doug cried that Johnny is not a lady beater and he just knew that things with Amber Heard weren’t going to end well. Doug didn’t really see Amber’s alleged manipulative ways with his own eyes. He just went with what Johnny told him.

Doug’s Defense Of A Millionaire Hobo essay led to Amber Heard suing his ass for defamation. Amber said in her lawsuit that Doug wrongly accused her of blackmailing Johnny and she said that any money she wins from the lawsuit will be donated to a battered women’s shelter in Arizona. Doug isn’t letting that defamation lawsuit keep him from opening his mouth flaps about this train wreck of a situation. Doug was on The Howard Stern Show (via People) yesterday and when Howard asked about the lawsuit, he didn’t say the words I say whenever my mom judgmentally asks me how many drinks I’ve had that week so far. Doug didn’t say,“I plead the fifth!”

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Amber Heard Is Suing Doug Stanhope For Defamation Of Character

That gal on the right must be a Depp stan.

That primal grunting-turned-moan of delicious ecstasy you just heard booming across the land is Doug Stanhope‘s publicist nutting prior to a carefree dozing off in the wet spot. Amber Heard is suing the comedian over the essay he wrote for The Wrap accusing her of lying about being physically abused by her husband –  accessories enthusiast Johnny Depp.

According to Reuters, Amber’s legal reps filed a defamation of character lawsuit against Doug and 20 “unnamed individuals associated with the comedian” in Cochise County, Arizona yesterday. Do the members of that godawful Hollywood Vampires band, their road crew, and any Boniva-fueled groupies lying about the tour bus make 20?

Amber’s legal team is asking for a jury trial, and stated that Amber will donate all proceeds to an Arizona battered women’s shelter.

Stanhope also posted his official declaration of membership in the Amber Heard Is An Asshole Liar club on his own blog. He sez that Amber is trying to make everyone think that drunk-ass Johnny repeatedly mistook her name for “Slamber” because Depp wouldn’t give in to her blackmailin’ ways.

Make of this what you will. I’m with Michael K., though. Doug Stanhope’s girlfriend’s name is Bingo?

Here’s Amber Heard and a friend leaving an office building in Beverly Hills yesterday:

Pics: Splash