Lisa Marie Presley Wants Sunflowers Galore For Michael Jackson

Lisa Marie Presley recently visited Michael Jackson’s tomb at Forest Lawn and she didn’t like seeing the giant empty space surrounding him so she has asked his fans to solve that problem. Lisa writes on her MySpace page that sunflowers made Michael Jackson’s soul do the crotch grab, so she wants all his fans to send a satin sunflower to fill up the space around his tomb. Lisa writes:

Greetings MJ Fans….

While visiting him a few days ago at Forest Lawn , Riley and I couldn’t help but notice that , while there are a few bouquets , candles and gifts there is a very large empty space around him and in front of him that could use a whole lot more.
While , I am sure that the staff at The Holy Terrace do their very best to place what is sent and what is placed at the door at his tomb , I thought you might like to know that he would want and deserves more than what is there and I had an idea…….
Some may or may not know this but his favorite flower was the Sunflower.
They made him happy because they looked happy to him , Thus, he called them “The Happy Flower”.

When we were married , I would try and fill up rooms with them wherever he was.
I wanted to bring something to place near him that he liked and that wouldn’t die so I brought a large vase of silk sunflowers and placed them near him.
This barely made any kind of dent in the atmosphere so I thought of maybe letting those who care know what the situation is and how we can solve it.

I know how much he loved and appreciated being showered with Gifts and flowers by his fans , I thought if whoever wants to bought just one silk sunflower each and sent it , the whole area around him and in front of him (As well as the two large empty vases that sit on either side of him) could be filled up in no time , which would be much more appropriate than what the current status is right now.
We can all cause a “Sun shower” if you will………..

He deserves to be flooded and surrounded , LETS SURROUND HIM!

Lots of Love,
~LMP

There are two Forest Lawns in LA which is confusing,
Below is the correct address to send them to:

The Holy Terrace At Forest Lawn
1712 South Glendale Avenue
Glendale Calif, 91205

So basically Lisa Marie wants the area in front of Michael Jackson’s tomb to look like a real-life version of the game Plants vs. Zombies. That game was my breakfast, lunch, and happy hour for months so I approve of her mission.

I also approve because when I was 14-years-old I planted a sunflower in my backyard and the first thing my friend said when he saw it was, “That is the gayest thing I’ve ever seen.” My sunflower practically curtsied at that compliment.

Michael Jackson Was Not Gay, So Says Joe Jackson

The rumor about Michael Jackson’s sexuality has flared up again, and this time Joe Jackson has something to say about it. Joe is shaking a pimp cane at Michael’s former doctor Arnold Klein for saying that his son was indeed a lover of penis. Arnold Klein said that he knew Michael was doing gay sex stuff with his office manager Jason Pfeiffer.

This information is not new since Jason has been saying for years that he used to spread the butter on MJ’s nalgas and lick brownie batter off of his porcelain body. Click here to see a picture of Jason so you know what I’m talking about.

Joe told TMZ that Arnold needs to shut his mouth about the gay talk. Joe said, “It’s not true. Michael was not gay. He has no respect for Michael … to say things about him when he’s gone is shameful. He’s a doctor and knows better than to break his vows against a patient.”

You know what’s shameful and disrespectful? Joe Jackson using the words “shameful” and “respect.”

Of course Joe is going to deny this. There’s no way he would ever admit Michael Jackson was gay FOR FREE! What kind of pimp do you take him for? Joe didn’t fall out of the backseat of a maroon Cadillac yesterday. The only way Joe will say that Michael was gay is if People Magazine agreed to do a post-mortem “Yup, I was gay!” cover story.

Who’s Bad?

ANSWER: Jermaine Jackson’s 13-year-old son Jaafar!

Child Protective Services was called to the Jackson family home in Encino last night after they heard about an incident involving Jaafar, Blanket Jackson and a taser gun. TMZ reports that last week the Jackson’s security team confiscated a taser gun Jaafar ordered off the internet. Katherine Jackson locked the gun up in one of her wig closets.

While Latarian Milton was in L.A., he must have taught Jaafar how to pick a lock using a fish bone, because he was able to get a hold of the taser gun.

Security caught Jaafar on the second floor of the home trying to turn 7-year-old Blanket into an ELECTRIC BLANKET! And that’s why CPS stepped in. According to sources, two social workers spoke to Katherine and Jaafar. They also confiscated the stun gun. They are planning to return to the home to investigate the incident further.

But Blanket isn’t safe yet! The sources added that there’s a second taser gun somewhere in the house. Poor Blanket will have to sleep with rubber boots on and a tongue depressor in his mouth. How dreadful.

Katherine needs to put her discipline wig on and handle those kids. It’s turning into Lord of the Flies over there.

Jaafar shares his name with a Disney villain, so this shouldn’t really surprise me, but it does. I would expect this type of behavior from Jermajesty, because well….his name is Jermajesty. If that was name, I’d be so angry that I’d tase every bitch within arm reach.

And if Jaafar really feels the need to tase, AIM FOR JOE!

Dr. Conrad Murray Will Be Charged With Manslaughter

Conrad Murray, the doctor with the common sense of a bitch on I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant, will be charged with involuntary manslaughter for his involvement in the death of Michael Jackson. Sources (aka Detective La Toya’s intuition) tell ABC News that Connie will be indicted through a criminal complaint as early as this week. The sources added that when he is charged, Connie will surrender himself to the police.

Connie has been the focus of a long investigation into the death of MJ. Connie admitted that he kept feeding MJ all sorts of painkillers and anesthetics right before he died. But Connie continues to believe that he did nothing wrong. His lawyers told ABC, “We continue to maintain that Dr. Murray neither prescribed nor administered anything that should have killed Michael Jackson.”

If convicted, Connie could get two to four years in the chokey.

You know Detective La Toya is at a Cache right now picking out her outfits if this goes to trial. La Toya wants to look her murder trial best when she throws Connie a “told you I’d catch you” look.

But really, there’s no need for La Toya to waste her precious time looking for court outfits, because this amazing ensemble below is the only one she needs:

And I also hope La Toya performs this beautiful song every single day during lunch break in front of the courthouse.

Where’s Blanket?

Here’s Prince Michael Jr. and Paris Jackson accepting their late father’s lifetime achievement award at the Grammy Awards tonight. To answer my own question above, I think Blanket couldn’t make it because he was meeting with the lawyers to legally change his nickname to Snuggie. It is 2010 after all.

I know we watched Paris speak at her father’s memorial, but it still is kind of strange hearing them talk. I guess I expect them to sound as quiet as a butterfly’s flutter (sorry Mimi) like their father. Prince Michael Jr. is so eloquent and so professional-like! If he was trying to sell me car insurance, I wouldn’t buy it because I don’t have a car. But I would be impressed with his pitch.

And I know some of you think that Joe Jackson’s strong pimp hand forced the kids to get on stage, but I’m not sure about that. If that was the case, Prince Michael Jr. would’ve kick, ball changed before name dropping Joe’s stupid ass Blu-ray production company.

UPDATE: Below is the 3D Michael Jackson tribute featuring Celine Dion, Tameka Foster’s former tucker, Jennifer Hudson, Carrie Underwears and Smokey Robinson. It’s basically a SCREAM OFF. You might be better off trying to find a 3D clip of Captain EO to watch. Well, unless you want to see what Beyonce and RiRi looked like while watching Avatar.

Joe Jackson Will Not Stop

Why would I not be surprised if Joe Jackson was caught on Michael Jackson’s coffin trying to rip the diamond fillings (you know he had some) out of his teeth? Joe was already shut down by a judge after he tried to get a piece of MJ’s estate. But Joe is trying to show the judge who the real pimp is, because he’s challenging the court’s decision.

TMZ reports that Joe filed papers echoing Randy Jackson’s claims that someone forged MJ’s signature on his last will. Joe also wants the judge to replace the current executors of MJ’s estate.

Obviously, Joe Jackson is just pulling this evil shit, because he wants Satan to give up his title as the ruler of Hell to him. Joe wouldn’t have shame if it crawled up his dick hole and took a nap. Joe’s pimp hand always gets the last smack!