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Cat Cora Filed A Restraining Order Against Her Ex-Wife For Allegedly Trying To Making Her Life A Living Hell 

September 17, 2020 / Posted by:

Currently, there are several celebrity divorce fights going on that the Department of Transportation has their eyes on since they’re certified train wrecks (see: Brangelina’s, Jaime King’s, Dr. Dre’s, etc…). But one would hope that after the court punches the divorce papers with a FINALIZED stamp, everyone would put down their shanks and go to their separate corners. Well, Cat Cora’s fucked-up relationship with her ex-wife, Jennifer Cora, might be the Messy Ghost of Relationship With Your Ex Yet To Come for those couples. Because Cat Cora, from Food Network’s Iron Chef America, wants a restraining order against Jennifer Cora. Cat claims that Jennifer is a nightmare bigger than getting ostrich as the secret ingredient on Iron Chef.

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Hot Slut Of The Day!

September 17, 2020 / Posted by:

The Albino Seal Pup!

And just with one magnificent over the shoulder “it’s over for you hos” pose, the albino seal pup did what we’ve all been waiting for and ended the modeling careers of Kendull Jenner, Gigi Hadid, and Bella Hadid with one simple yet devastating pose. Anna Wintour’s claw hasn’t touched the pulse of fashion in years, but if it did, she’d put that picture on the cover of Vogue.

Everyone’s new favorite model is an extremely rare albino seal pup that has been given the NOT RIGHT and extremely false name of Ugly Duckling. I’m going to take a wild guess and say that whoever gave him that name is confused in the brains and thought Ugly Duckling really meant Ravishing Beauty.

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Birthday Sluts

September 17, 2020 / Posted by:
Cassandra “Elvira” Peterson (69)
Ella Purnell (24)
Mena Massoud (29)
Pixie Geldof (30)
Danielle Brooks (31)
Wade Robson (38)
Neill Blomkamp (41)
Constantine Maroulis (45)
Bobby Lee (49)
Nate Berkus (49)
Keith Flint (51)
Matthew Settle (51)
Anastacia (52)
Malik Yoba (53)
Doug E. Fresh (54)
Paula Jones (54)

Pic: Instagram

Bryan Singer (55)
Kyle Chandler (55)
Amy Roloff (56)
James Urbaniak (57)
Baz Luhrmann (58)
Dustin Nguyen (58)
BeBe Winans (58)
Kevin Clash (60)
Charles Martinet (65)
Rita Rudner (67)
Nick Cordero (1978-2020)
John Ritter (1948-2003)
Lupe Ontiveros (1942-2012)
Anne Bancroft (1931-2005)
Roddy McDowall (1928-1998)
Hank Williams (1923-1953)
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Night Crumbs

September 16, 2020 / Posted by:

A source tells People that Katie Holmes has the loin quivers for her new man Emilio Vitilo Jr. so bad that she texts him all day long and he loves it. Well, if she’s wondering why EVJ didn’t immediately text her back when she sent him her 578th text of the day the other day, that’s because he was probably using his “source” voice to call People to tell them how Katie Holmes can be considered his conjoined twin since she’s THAT stuck on him – Lainey Gossip 

Honestly, Duchess Kate should’ve accessorized her look with a Bombay Company hall table, a floral hurricane lamp, and a crystal candy bowl filled with Werther’s. Because that would’ve really made her grandma’s hallway wallpaper dress pop – Celebitchy

The same goes for Emma RobertsPopoholic

Because Saturday Night Live doesn’t have a cast full of actors who do impersonations, Jim Carrey is playing Joe Biden on the show, which is probably just going to be Jim Carrey playing Fire Marshall Bill in a fancier suit – Pajiba

Even Doogie Howser, M.D., and his entire family got coronavirus – Towleroad

The sole reason for why Photoshop was invented – OMG Blog

Pic: Wenn.com

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August’s Hot Sluts Of The Month Are….

September 16, 2020 / Posted by:

Not only are Electra and Viola, the lesbian supermom penguins of Spain (which sounds like my favorite Marvel movie that never was), frontrunners for Mothers of the Year (although, any mom who doesn’t drop her kid off at Miss Hannigan’s doorstep after their fifth tantrum of the day deserves Mother of the Fucking Year), but they are also our reigning Hot Sluts of the Month!

Electra and Viola, who live in Spain’s Oceanogràfic Valencia aquarium, gave us a tiny sprinkle of sweetness on the butt foam and dick pus sundae that is 2020 when they were given an egg to incubate and out hatched their chick child. They warmed the frostbitten dead hearts of the internet, including all of you who voted for them for HSOTM. They got 44% of the votes, beating The Crocs-Snatching Fox Of Berlin (37%), who clearly didn’t snatch enough votes for the win, Just Magical Marshmallows (10%), and Kudos (9%).

Electra and Viola will compete for Hot Slut of 2020 next year. Thanks to all who voted!

Pic: Facebook

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Noel Gallagher Has Very Noel Gallagher Thoughts About Wearing A Mask

September 16, 2020 / Posted by:

If Noel Gallagher had calmly said that he’s more than happy to wear a mask since he cares about other human beings and wants to do his part to stop the spread of coronavirus, I’d immediately lube up my parts and assume the position, because I’d finally get some since today is Opposite Day. But since Noel Gallagher is Noel Gallagher he didn’t say that and while on Matt Morgan’s Funny How? podcast (via The Guardian), he made it damn clear that the only way he would hate a mask more is if it had the words I Love Adele embroidered on it.

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