Hot Slut Of The Day!
Dizzy Dryer!
In the early-90s, Milton Bradley decided that what would bring kids hours of entertainment was a battery-operated plastic bucket that spat out balls that children had to collect off the floor and put back into the bucket. That’s how the fuckery machine that was Mr. Bucket was born. Well, Mattel must have looked at Mr. Bucket and thought, “Let’s do that but with laundry!” Because a few years later, Mattell spat out Dizzy Dryer, a game that was pretty much like Mr. Bucket. Kids tossed plastic clothes into Dizzy Dryer and watched ’em as they spun around. Never mind that this is the kind of mindless shit we did in the 90s as entertainment; Mattel truly missed an opportunity. They should’ve gotten Pete Burns to be the face of Dizzy Dryer and get Pete to yodel out the game’s theme song; You Spin Me Round (Like A Plastic Shirt).
A round of Dizzy Dryer started with each player choosing one of four colors of clothes (red, yellow, green, and blue). You then turned on that dizzy bitch, and as Dizzy Dryer rattled around like me after downing my third vodka Red Bull, players took turns rolling a dice. The dice didn’t have numbers on it. It had articles of clothing on its four sides, and whatever you rolled, you had to toss into Dizzy Dryer. Like, if you rolled a shirt, you had to throw one of your plastic shirts into Dizzy Dryer’s dizzy mouth. If Dizzy Dryer barfed out one of your plastic clothing pieces, you had to hold onto it and try again. The player to get all their clothing pieces into Dizzy Dryer’s mouth won!
The good thing about Dizzy Dryer is that when kids got bored of playing with it, parents could take them to the laundry room and introduce them to Dizzy Dryer’s father, Daddy Dryer, and a game called Folding Fun! The way that game works is that kids have to pull clothes out of the dryer and fold them. The first kid to finish folding all their clothing pieces without bitching once wins! Hours of entertainment!
Pic: Worthpoint