Open Post: Hosted By Twinkies Cereal, Which May Become An Actual Thing

July 16, 2019 / Posted by:

I’m glad to see that cereal companies don’t give a single fuck about the rise of childhood diabetes in the world–as it’s being reported by Food & Wine that a new cereal is on the horizon. Twinkies cereal, which looks like a cross between fried maggots and uncut penises, may be coming soon, so expect blood sugar levels to get to some dangerous levels.

Last year Post created two cereals based on some of their popular snack cakes. Honey Bun Cereal and Donettes Cereal have been making parents tell their children: “No that is not food, that is sugar,” for the past year. Well now it seems that another of their sugary treats may be getting turned into something they’ll call ‘cereal’ and sell to children as part of a ‘balanced breakfast’… more like balancing your blood sugar levels after getting Type 2 Diabetes.

On Reddit someone posted an image of the Twinkies Cereal box. The person who posted the image claimed it was from “Post’s foodservice catalog,” so if that’s true then this cereal is very likely a real thing.

So if they aren’t cream-filled, are they just like… cake dots?

Food & Wine reached out to Post and Hostess to see if their Twinkies cereal was a real thing, but there has been no word back yet. Maybe they’re keeping the cereal release hush-hush? Maybe they’re working with some celebrity to release it like Reese’s did with Travis Scott? But which celebrity would be a good brand representation of Twinkies? Joe Simpson? Calvin Klein? Who is best to represent the love we have for Twinkies?

Pic: Instagram

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