Justin Timberlake Calls Jessica Biel’s Body A Temple In His New Book

October 31, 2018 / Posted by:

Imagine for a moment being Justin Timberlake. Of course there are some terrifying aspects of this scenario; you’re forever going to remind people of Top Ramen, Prince’s ghost will hate you for eternity, and you’ll have Wonder Wheel on your IMDB page forever. But the obvious advantage is that nobody will ever say “no” to you. Wanna rip Janet Jackson’s shirt off in front a worldwide audience? Sure! Want to write pop album but disguise it as a country album? Go ahead! Want to write a book called Hindsight: And All The Things I Can’t See In Front Of Me? Absolutely, Justin! That sounds like a great idea!

Here’s the cover.

According to Us Weekly, Justin’s done just that. He’s written a book which cannot in any world be any good. In it he writes a lot about his wife Jessica Biel. Methinks Justin may know that his wife is his ticket to respectability. Without her, he’s just “the main guy from NSync with the Top Ramen hair who ripped Janet’s shirt off at the Super Bowl”. With her, it’s easier for him to play “Man Of The Woods And Serious Actor And Musician And Now Author”. In the book, Justin details their courtship, marriage, family, and Jessica’s body. Oh, I should also mention that it’s a coffee table book with lots of pictures so Justin didn’t have to finish all his homework.

This is probably the 8th take, they tried really hard to get a shot of him without his tongue sticking out in concentration. In the book, Justin describes Jessica’s body as a temple to be worshiped. Here’s a taste of Justin’s stirring prose.

“I’ve watched my wife change. I’ve watched her body change. It’s a temple. It should be worshiped. It should be marveled at,” the Grammy winner, 37, writes of Biel, 36. “I’m fascinated by her. She’s everything, man. She just constantly surprises me with who she is, and who she’s becoming, and I really hope I do the same for her. I’m excited to see what she’s going to do next. I wake up and roll over and look at her, and I’m inspired.”

Justin also calls Jessica “a poet”. That’s why he put her voice on the MOTW album. Justin says “She’s almost a narrator, or a voice of consciousness, and she even has her own interlude on the album entitled ‘Hers’”. How generous of him. Need proof of her poetic prowess?

Sure, read with care, but also, flip through with care. Those glossy picture pages are sharp and you might get a paper cut!

I actually think this might the first actual book Justin has ever held.

If Tower Records still existed, in one month this book would be on clearance and piled up near the register under “Gift Ideas For Your Teenage Grandchild You Don’t Really Know Very Well”.

Pic: Wenn.com

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