Thanks To A Paternity Test, Owen Wilson Learned He’s Got A Third Kid 

September 28, 2018 / Posted by:

No, that child is not Owen Wilson’s (that we know of). That’s the kid from Room. But Page Six says that the Butterscotch Stallion found out that one of his barebacking adventures have led to him having to write “child support” on the memo of another monthly check.

Owen has a 4-year-old son named Finn with personal trainer Caroline Lindqvist, and a 7-year-old son named Robert Ford with Jade Duell. In June, there was a story that a woman named Varunie Vongsvirates, who supposedly works for American Addiction Centers in L.A., let Owen know that one of his butterscotch-flavored dick pudding sperm fishes knocked her up. Owen agreed to take a paternity test to see if he’s the father, and the results declared that Owen IS the father. But if Maury Povich doesn’t announce that you ARE the father, are you really the father? Owen could use that defense in court if he wanted to.

It’s not really known if Varunie and Owen are together together. They were papped together in 2014, and last month, she posted a #tbt pic on Instagram of her and Owen at the premiere of Father Figures in 2017. On June 23, Varunie posted a picture of the unborn Butterscotch Pony, a girl, and said that she’s due in September.

View this post on Instagram

Say hello to Lyla ? 3 months to go! ?

A post shared by Varunie (@varunie) on

Varunie also confirmed that Owen’s the father of her baby when somebody asked her on Instagram. She was papped this month at a park looking every kind of pregnant.

I can hear some of you screaming that the Butterscotch Stallion needs to help himself while helping out a fellow horse by investing in some Trojans, but why?! I’ve always said that you should let a bareback slut, be a bareback slut. Besides, by continuing to make babies with different women he doesn’t stay with, Owen Wilson is helping out the Department of Child Support Services. Owen is keeping jobs alive!

Pic: Wenn.com

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