Night Crumbs

Have you ever wanted to know what it feels like to get your prostate gently prodded by a neon light rainbow covered with glitter lube as a topless piece in a flamingo costume tickles your ears with his feathers? Well, I’ve done it, and I just gotta say to make sure the neon light rainbow ain’t plugged in before you fuck yourself with it. But if you want to experience that without risking electrocution of the culo, listen to Cher’s magnificent cover of ABBA’s SOS from the upcoming album of the century! – Towleroad

Gemma Chan and Dominic Cooper are at that point in their relationship where they’re dressing alike. That’s when dickmatization and coochmatization collide – Lainey Gossip

Oh, it’s just Lady Gaga fucking an octoplushie – Drunken Stepfather

Shannon Beador of The Real PlasticWives of Orange County might get a titty lift, I thought you should know – Reality Tea

Okay, but during her vows, did Hilary Swank say, “And if I win another Oscar, I promise to say your name during my speech“? – Celebitchy

Kate Beckinsale and Margot Robbie were shown up by a glamorous mermaid – Popoholic

Connie Britton and Dylan McDermott are going back to American Horror Story – Popsugar

Elizabeth Hurley doing a topless Shamu-style lift out of the water is mesmerizing – Hollywood Tuna

The full Suspiria remake trailer had me at Tilda Swinton looking like a terrifying Morticia Addams under disco lighting – Pajiba

Note to not-knowing evil bitches: Don’t write Olivia Newton-John’s obit – SOW

Pic: YouTube