File This Under: “Girl, You Can Do Better”

April 15, 2016 / Posted by:

I mean, not a lot better, since we all know her vagina craves douchebag-flavored dick. But at least better than professional headache Justin Bieber. So remember back in October, when the Kardashian sister that most closely resembles Kim’s original body and face, Kourtney Kardashian, was seen slinking out of a club with Justin Bieber? And then two months later a rumor started going around that the two were doing it regularly? Well according to People, it’s still going on.

A source tells People that soon-to-be 37-year-old Kourtney and just-turned 22-year-old Justin have been “hooking up on and off for a few months now.” No one can really know for sure whether or not Justin and Kourtney are friends with-I-wouldn’t-call-humping-on-Bieber-a-benefit. But this might explain things for Justin’s on-again/off again girlfriend Selena Gomez if his dick has smelled like laser-fried cooch recently.

I’m all for anyone getting it, whatever “it” does it for them. But to quote the great Tommy Lee Jones, I cannot sanction your buffoonery, Kourtney. Justin may be 22, but his brain can’t be more advanced than that of a 16-year-old high school drop out. And you know that would carry over into how he has sex. I bet he calls it “gettin’ nasty“, will only do it on the couch in her rec-room after putting Family Guy on mute, and only pulls his boxers down to his knees. If Khloe really wants to save someone, she should swoop and save her sister. At the very least, someone needs to teach her how to love herself.

Here’s Kourtney with the other children in her life, her actual children Penelope and Reign, leaving some singing class in Beverly Hills yesterday.

Pics: Splash,

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