Damn You, Dylan Farrow, For Making ScarJo’s Google Alerts Go Crazy!

March 17, 2014 / Posted by:

Dylan Farrow and The New York Times are both so damn inconsiderate! On February 1st, The New York Times posted Dylan Farrow’s  op-ed piece about how Woody Allen molested her as a girl and before they hit the publish button, they didn’t ever think to themselves, “But what is this going to do ScarJo’s Google Alerts?” Why won’t anyone think of ScarJo’s Google Alerts?!

In Dylan’s piece, she called out the likes of ScarJo for working with a child-touching dehydrated turtle monster. So ScarJo was asked about being name checked by Dylan during an interview with The Guardian’s Carole Cadwalladr for her movie Under the Skin. ScarJo, who is a disciple of the Ignorance Is Bliss way of life, used a lot of words to say “no comment” and it’s obvious she’s still pissed about the fact that on February 1st her night was ruined when she got Google Alert after Google Alert.

“I think it’s irresponsible to take a bunch of actors that will have a Google alert on and to suddenly throw their name into a situation that none of us could possibly knowingly comment on. That just feels irresponsible to me.”

Carole asked her about the backlash against Woody Allen and she mouth queefed this out:

“I’m unaware that there’s been a backlash. I think he’ll continue to know what he knows about the situation, and I’m sure the other people involved have their own experience with it. It’s not like this is somebody that’s been prosecuted and found guilty of something, and you can then go, ‘I don’t support this lifestyle or whatever.’ I mean, it’s all guesswork. I don’t know anything about it. It would be ridiculous for me to make any kind of assumption one way or the other. “

Oh yes, child touching is a lifestyle. Woody Allen is practically the Goopy Paltrow of child molestation and I’m sure ScarJo will be his first subscriber when he joins child touching forces with Roman Polanski, PedoBear and R. Kelly to launch a pedophile lifestyle newsletter called PEDDY.

Since ScarJo was on a roll, Carole asked her if she regrets quitting her role as an Oxfam ambassador for a giant check from SodaStream. ScarJo and Oxfam broke up with each other after she signed on to be SodaStream’s newest ho. SodaStream has a factory on the West Bank and Oxfam doesn’t like that. ScarJo doesn’t regret shit:

“No, I stand behind that decision. I was aware of that particular factory before I signed it.Yes, and… it still doesn’t seem like a problem. Until someone has a solution to the closing of that factory to leaving all those people destitute, that doesn’t seem like the solution to the problem.”

Carole told ScarJo that a lot of people felt like she was choosing a pile of money over charity, to which she said:

“Sure I think that’s the way you can look at it. But I also think for a non-governmental organisation to be supporting something that’s supporting a political cause… there’s something that feels not right about that to me. There’s plenty of evidence that Oxfam does support and has funded a BDS [boycott, divest, sanctions] movement in the past. It’s something that can’t really be denied.”

FYI: Oxfam says that it’s something that can really be denied, because they deny it.

During this interview about child touchers and the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, ScarJo’s publicist sat on the side and kept trying to steer the conversation into safer topics while shitting themselves. After that interview, ScarJo’s publicist probably took her ass aside and told her that the next time an interviewer asks her serious questions about serious issues, she should just shake her pregnant titties until the interviewer gets hypnotized by her spectacular chichis and loses their train of thought. I mean, she uses that technique whenever she needs people to forget what a shitty actress she is and it works every time!

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