From The “NO DUH” Files: Oprah Says Working With LiLo Is A Nightmare

January 12, 2014 / Posted by:

Oprah is either the world’s highest-functioning idiot or the world’s most convincing liar (ding ding ding!), because according to the NY Daily News, she was shocked – SHOCKED – that working with noted coke head/alcoholic/piece of drama-loving trash Lindsay Lohan on her $2 Million publicity stunt reality show would end up being a wagon-full-of-fat-sized headache:

“This is just what everyone warned me would happen (working with her). And it is,” Winfrey says in a clip from the show, screened for TV critics. Winfrey can be seen seething about the troubled film star after Lohan refuses to take part in scheduled filming. Later, Winfrey says to Lohan, “My truth is, I really do want you to win … but if that isn’t what you want, I’m okay with that. I will tell these guys to pack up and leave today.” Lohan responds: “I know this is my last shot at doing what I have to do.”

Then White Oprah appeared out of nowhere yelling: “Shots? Who said shots!? Let’s celebrate your sobriety with shots! Ps – can I borrow $40,000?”

Let’s for a second play Devil’s Advocate (“Sorry, but I’ve trademarked that for myself”Kris Jenner). Perhaps Oprah really did think she could help Blohan turn her life around. I mean, I sort of believed that The Canyons would be her comeback and she’d finally be nominated for an Academy Award; but then the ghost of Cher in Moonstruck appeared and yelled “Snap out of it!” as she slapped me across the face to remind me that Lindsay is the King Midas of turning everything she touches to shit. So I feel like it’s very possible that Oprah was convinced Lindsay had good intentions and believed she was serious about sobriet…oh, forget it. The reason was publicity. She needed the publicity, case closed.

(Pic via

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