George Michael Can’t Drive: Part 34,567,774

George Michael needs to add “steering wheels” (right under “public toilets” and “sticking his tongue out in public“) on his list of shit he should stay away from for a while, because he has been arrested again for crashing his car into something! At around 3:30 on Sunday morning, George rammed his Range Rover into the crotch of a Snappy Snap store without asking it first. OH SNAP is right.

George knows the drill, so The Sun says he got out of his Range Rover and politely waited for his old friends, THE COPS, to show up. George was taken down to the station and was later released on bail. A police spokeswhore only had this to say:

“Officers attended and a man in his 40s was arrested on suspicion of being unfit to drive. He was taken to a north London police station and later bailed to return on August 13 pending inquiries.”

The police wouldn’t say if George was boozed or stoned at the time of the crash.

George was busted last year after he smashed into a lorry while driving under the influence of the good shit. In 2007, George was banned from driving for 2 years after he was found asleep at the wheel in the middle of an intersection in North West London.

George is way too seasoned for this shit! That old bitch knows by now that you should park your Range Rover on an empty street BEFORE your trick for the night throws his legs around your neck and starts lapping up your nut sweat. George has already proven that he’s steering wheel-challenged, so 69ing while driving is only for professionals.

Or maybe George is just doing this shit on purpose. Maybe nothing gives him the tingles like getting handcuffed by a cop. If that’s the case, George needs more Craigslist in his life, because he can find that shit on there without even having to get into his Range Rover.