YO DOUCHE!

Spencer Pratt’s advice column for Radar called Yo Spencer! has finally arrived. The Hills douche will shell out advice to readers every week on Radar Online. Here’s a question he answered this week:

YO SPENCER! I just started dating this guy who I really like. The other night, we went out and got hammered. I ended up passing out in his bed. When I woke up, I discovered that I had wet the bed. I was so embarrassed that I left while he was still asleep. If I call him, do I have to apologize or can I pretend it never happened? Or do I have to wait for him to call me?

Wow! This is a situation you do not want to find yourself in. I personally would never want to be with a girl who gets so wasted that she’s pissing in bed. It’s time to sign up for AA, my dear, because drunks are not sexy. Regardless, if the guy’s really, really, really cool, he might understand. But I wouldn’t count on it. Best bet is to be honest and tell him that was the drunkest you’ve ever been and that it was a huge mistake and it’ll never happen again. And make sure you buy him new sheets.

What the hell kind of advice is that? Boooring. I’d tell that bitch that unless the dude’s name is R. Kelly or Kim Kardashian, he’s probably not going to call. She also needs to go to the doctor, because nasty bitch has bladder issues. I’d also tell the girl, “It’s ok Heidi. Spencer will forgive you for pissing in the bed. MTV will make him.”

Spencer was also asked about how he deals with his haters. Spencer loves his haters and went on to say, “I flipped a couple haters at Benihana just last night.”

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