The Look Of The Night Goes To....
Before Catherine Zeta-Jones scared the children by working the Oscar stage like a wigged, horny banshee on the loose during "All That Jazz," she put dozens of hos to shame when she sashayed down the red carpet like RuPaul, Michelle Visage and Santino Rice were sitting at a table in front of her. CZJ looked like Miss Philippines in the final round of Miss Transgender Universe 2013 and I'm pretty sure her dress was made out of the gold parts from a dozen Wonder Woman costumes.
After Michael Douglas and CZJ talked to Ryan Seacrest on the red carpet, that Frogger-looking motherfucker with Sears Portrait Studio hair snubbed her ass. Oh that was just Seacrest's jealousy showing, because he's just mad that CZJ can steal all of his men with just the wink of an eye. I don't even care that CZJ's face is completely brand new, she was still the epitome of drag eleganza last night.
And my other favorite looks of the night came from Charlize Theron and Jane Fonda. Unless your name is Shauna Sand, Angelyne or Harald Gloockler, I don't like calling you perfect, but Charlize Theron looked pretty perfect last night. Charlize must have a birth make shaped like Donald Trump's head on her inner thigh and one of her nipples must be way fatter than the other, because something has to be wrong with her ass. Also, I just want to get drunk with Jane Fonda and watch her pick up men in the piano bar of a business hotel.
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Submitted by TelevisedRevolution on Tue, 02/26/2013 - 3:31am.
I like Charlize a lot, but she's got a five head, same as Rihanna. I think they are both beautiful, though.
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and rihanna's single diamonds is pretty good! :P
CZJ- was absolutely stunning. Now she looks like she is ready to play a round of the snatch game.
Jane- She is killing it! Stunning!
Charlize- Goddess
I like Charlize a lot, but she's got a five head, same as Rihanna. I think they are both beautiful, though.
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God don't like ugly.
id on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 2:17pm.
OK. Google tells me Michael is 67. I don't know about that, he looks quite a bit older to me. Very frail. Could be the cancer I guess.
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You mean 68. MD is born 9/25/1944.
Thumb #8, CZJ should change her name to drag name, like Miss Bee-haven.
Submitted by oceanlover998 on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 7:53pm.
...Charlize Theron just leaves me cold...and she's probably as miserable as they come when the cameras aren't around...
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Do any looking around and you'll see Charlize's reputation is pretty damn flawless. Smoking all that weed makes a gal nice apparently, because she is as down-to-earth as they come.
Fonda is still a traitor to this country in my eyes. Maybe it's because I'm old enough to remember the stunt she pulled in Vietnam.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
Submitted by loopygorilla on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 10:12pm.
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Did you ever see that video where Dolly said she went to a drag show, competed and then LOST? LOL She said the other contestants did her much better! They didn't even recognize her and she's tiny! A mini drag queen, hahaha And I agree, CZJ looks so bodacious. But would she lip sync to herself?!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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CZJ definitely brought her amazon "drag eleganza" game last night.
As usual, Charlize was utter perfection and Fonda looked gorgeous.
Frogger-looking motherfucker with Sears Portrait Studio hair *dies* He's a complete ass!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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sheek, freak, work that sister glam, those are only some words that gay men understand.
I FREAKING love dragalicious CZJ. if CZJ turned up to a drag event, she would win.
Lisop... You've heard the saying you get the face you deserve... Kirk and his wife got theirs..
Now is the time. You're not promised tomorrow. -PR
Who the fuck is gaycrest to snub CZJ, which he totally did. She may be a diva but she has more talent in her pinky nail than he does in his whole body.
Can someone please make a gif of the glorious Charlize Theron dancing with that flowy white dress on the stage. Oh an if you can make it slow motion that would be great. kay? bye.
CZJ needs to hang up the "I'm 43" bullshit that's a post menopausal body underneath a face virtually bloated with fillers. It.just.is.
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
CZJ and Michael need to stop now or they're going to end up looking like Michael's parents. I SWEAR I did not edit that pic!!!
http://www.thetimes.co.uk/tto/multimedia/archive/00388/122757081_388202b...
...THAT's what CZJ looks like now?!!!...there's hardly anything left of her original face!...looks kinda like a cross between a heftier Demi Moore and a brunette Paula Deane...
...Charlize Theron just leaves me cold...and she's probably as miserable as they come when the cameras aren't around...
...yes La Fonda is amazing...who says anorexia, bulimia, and over-exercise in your 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, and 60s don't pay huge dividends in your late 70s?...
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...'Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason '...
I used to think CZJ was one of the most naturally beautiful women on the planet. She has had work done. Bad move. :(
* 100% hotness verified by WHAMO. :P *
www.poopreport.com :)
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RIMADYL KILLS
Jane Fonda is fucking awesome.
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There's no way she's 10 years older than 43. That would mean she had Dylan when she was 40 or 41, then had Carys at 44 or 45.
Charlize = perfect.
"HOdor"
ImpertinentVixen -- I thought Jennifer Hudson was screaming, too -- I don't call that singing. And CZJ may have had plastic surgery, but she's showing her age, which is 53, not 43 like she's been claiming.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"Two eyes, two eyebrows."
Grim Reaper, I'm putting a twenty on Kirk. Michael don't look long for this world.
Didnt CZJ have bipolar disorder? Plus, with Michael Douglas's cancer, it could have amounted to some serious mental breakdown.
Her posing looks off...like she is trying too hard. She used to glide onto the carpet...I remember noticing that first thing about her. I was always amazed by her beauty - it was really natural. Odd.
Charlize Theron is just annoying - just so pretty and gorgeous. I cannot get over her in the Dior commercial (my fav perfume - Jadore). I cannot believe a woman could look that gorgeous in the awful haircut - I SO hate her. Wow!
Michael looks ill, as does his wife, just another type of ill. Charlize looks like a goddess. And as much as I hate to like anything about her Jane Fonda looks amazing for 75.
WTF happened to CZJ's face?!!! She used to be so amazingly gorgeous. Ugggh.
So SICK and TIRED of all of these amazingly beautiful women effing up their face with Botox and plastic surgery. Ridiculous. I would much rather see a little wrinkle or sag then this wax-doll visage. It almost looks like Michael Douglas is taking a picture next to CZJ's was figurine! YUCK!
Meanwhile, he still looks fairly normal. Double standard to the max - women have to look like they are "forever young" and the dudes look ancient. I know some women (RARE women) do not fall for this, but most do.
UGGH!
damn way to mess up a beautiful face CZJ...you should take tips from Jane Fonda, now THAT is how you age...and my girl Charlize, who could be bald with a face like that and a statuesque build she is just beyond breathtaking, I couldn't even watch any other ho's she just took my breath away...all the time.
she looks like Shania Twain in that picture.
Submitted by joe shmoe on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 1:36pm.
Submitted by MissAnnThrope on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 1:28pm.
upon further inspection of CZJ... She looks so different because her surgeon cut whatever it was that made her look like her, right off her face. All traces of personality, laugh lines, LIFE, which makes us who we are-- are simply gone. She looks like wax.
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Agree. The only recognizable thing about her now is Michael Douglas.
AHAHAHH - THIS!!!! Both of you, so true.
I think her look is just a little too...much.
Hair, a little too dark. Face, a little too tight. Lashes, a little too long. It's subtle, but it all adds up to her not looking like herself. Which sucks, because before the work (even in her slightly pudge days) I thought she was so beautiful. And that dress is awful. She looks amazing in jewel tones. Neutrals just suck the life out of her.
eta: Charlize looks perfect. I so would.
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Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps. ~ Emo Phillips
CZJ got the 'Megan Fox' I see.
Any other straight girls feeling a little turned on by Charlize's wide shoulders and rib cage?
Ladies of entertainment,
please stop trying to make yellow work. It is not the look.
Yours truly,
my eyes
CZJ looks like a totally different person. Plastic surgery is not a great hobby, dear. Find a new one.
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I swear, sometimes good dick is a thing of evil. - Michael K 1/16/13
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 1:43pm.
Submitted by lislop on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 1:41pm.
I want to know if Jennifer Garner let Ben Affleck into the house last night after he admitted to the whole world she has put up with his shenanigans for "10 Christmases". Hahaha.
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I LOVED that he did that. Everyone always gets up there are pretends they have perfect fucking lives. Marriage IS work, and there is no shame in admitting it!
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Some comedian tweeted: "Oh, so this is *WORK* to you?" - Jennifer Garner to Ben at couples' counseling.
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 12:38pm.
I think that people who can REALLY pull off cropped short hair always look their best with it
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Agreed. Like, Natalie Portman, too--I don't really like her but I think she looks better with short hair.
I said to my sister last night that CZJ's dress looks like something Xena the Warrior Princess would wear if she went to the Oscar's. Although, upon closer look, the sequins might not fit Xena's style, but it's definitely true of the pattern.
Hate Jane Fonda's dress (and hair). I think the shape suits her but why did she have to wear bold 80's yellow? I thought it was funny that she and Michael Douglas, both of whom have had tons of plastic surgery, presented together (he looked so tiny!).
do you remember when michael douglas couldn't keep his peen wrangled?
i bet all the girls run for their lives now...
although quite lovely, czj doesn't look like herself...at all...
charlize is beautiful
jane fonda looks great too..
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
Well, looky here __ Sweet Brown reportedly* at the Oscars
http://i.mediatakeout.com/photo/1361807754f9d87c2cc3.jpg
I think CZJ is looking a little Demi Moore in the face parts, and that's no damn good.
Loved when Charlize said that after cutting her hair she donated a big bag of products. Hair, too, I'm sure.
OK. Google tells me Michael is 67. I don't know about that, he looks quite a bit older to me. Very frail. Could be the cancer I guess.
Submitted by I AM Afraid on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 2:15pm.
Just how old is Mr. Douglas?
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138 if I'm not mistaken
CJZ has never done it for me. Claiming to be 43. Does any know what her real age is? I'm just curious. Whatever. For my money, Miss Fonda with her surgery (she cops to at least some surgery, unlike CJZ and Kidman) and hard work, was stuntin' on hos 1/3 her age. Emmanuelle Riva - true beauty. DAME Shirley Bassey and Babs - working it. Sally Field - cute as hell.
Loved that Ol Squinty eyes was so fucked up she couldn't open her eyes wide enough to read.
Did anyone see JHud's house of sister? She unfortunately is insane. I feel so bad for JHud with so much of her family murdered.
Love that DListers hate Seacrest as much as I do. And I never use the word "cunt" cuz I hate it, but Seacrest is exactly that.
Just how old is Mr. Douglas?
That's true. Very short hair (or even bald!) allows facial features to dominate without the hair pulling any focus, so it really shows off perfect bone structure ~ cheekbones, nose. Conversely, if any of the features were ummm, unfortunate, they would appear even more so. Not Charlize's problem though. She's a stunner!
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Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 12:43pm:
Charlize can pull it off because her face is so pretty, she would literally be pretty bald
Stewart Townsend, eat your fucking heart out.
CZJ should return that face.
Submitted by bambam on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 2:07pm.
Too bad. Anyway I checked out the pbs site and saw they have vid shows of all sorts of artists like Alabama Shakes and Jack White, thought you might like some of them. Type in video.pbs.org to pull it up.
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I just saw the Alabama Shakes Saturday night(?) and LOVED them (read up on them as I do with all band I see or listen to) as well I'm a huge Jack White Fan.
I always watch Austin City Lights and see tons of great artists I otherwise wouldn't know of.
re BTO... Randy Bachman is one hell of a guitar player for sure!
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 1:48pm.
Submitted by bambam on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 1:19pm.
Hey Whams, do you like Esperanza Spaulding?
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I'll be honest I've never really sat down and listened to her, she's not really my go to style of music but I do appreciate her talent.
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Too bad. Anyway I checked out the pbs site and saw they have vid shows of all sorts of artists like Alabama Shakes and Jack White, thought you might like some of them. Type in video.pbs.org to pull it up.
btw, I watched a BTO reunion show the other night too. Shit was awesome man.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fgQ-QrCFMjs
CZJ looked her actual age last night.
Submitted by Hekki on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 12:39pm.
re CZJ: "Doesn't matter, though. She's about to become a very wealthy woman."
You made me snicker!
And Good Lord, Charlize looks so perfect.
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"More cunnilingus has been performed to Baker Street than any other song in history." (some anonymous online mope)
Submitted by bambam on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 1:19pm.
Hey Whams, do you like Esperanza Spaulding?
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I'll be honest I've never really sat down and listened to her, she's not really my go to style of music but I do appreciate her talent.
Elmo, I think they said she dropped out.
Submitted by lislop on Mon, 02/25/2013 - 1:41pm.
I want to know if Jennifer Garner let Ben Affleck into the house last night after he admitted to the whole world she has put up with his shenanigans for "10 Christmases". Hahaha.
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I LOVED that he did that. Everyone always gets up there are pretends they have perfect fucking lives. Marriage IS work, and there is no shame in admitting it!
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I've had to work much harder than this
For something I want don't try to resist me