April 17, 2009 / Posted by:

During the whole press tour for Grey Gardens, Drew Barrymore has been looking like the kind of bitch I want to enter into a drag queen lip-synch contest, so she can win me two drink tickets and a bag of Wet ‘N Wild cosmetics. That’s a positive thing. Seriously, Drew has been looking really hot and you know I don’t pass around compliments the same way I pass around my ass.

At last night’s L.A. premiere, Drew brought it again…almost. The Fuckerella hair, the Valley of the Dolls dress, it’s all doing good things to me. That’s until she smiled. Now, I don’t like it when teefs look like giant gleaming white Chiclets, but I shouldn’t want to drop her teefs into a baked potato either. That is some Parkay shit! Homegirl just needs a little Wite-Out and she’ll be good to roll.

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